Author: David Sopp Publisher: Running Press Adult ISBN: 9780762456581 Category : Humor Languages : en Pages : 0
Book Description
With its laugh-out-loud guidance on baby care, Safe Baby Handling Tips is a must-have for anyone overwhelmed—and befuddled—when it comes to caring for their bundle of joy. Now, it's updated and refreshed to be even more helpful and relevant to the modern parent. Incompetent parents everywhere can benefit from this indispensable guide—complete with The Wheel of Responsibility to help moms and dads negotiate baby responsibilities (and shirk diaper duty!) whenever they can. Makes baby-rearing a blast!
Author: Jacob Sager Weinstein Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing ISBN: 1449410391 Category : Humor Languages : en Pages : 137
Book Description
"This laugh-out-loud hilarious book is mandatory reading for parents, and should be taught in schools as the "cautionary tale" portion of Sex Ed. Run don't walk to buy it, and if you're a baby with lethal parents, crawl don't roll." --Rob Kutner (writer, The Daily Show, Conan, The Future According To Me) "Unlike babies themselves, copies of Jacob Sager Weinstein's book can be bought and sold on the open market. Buy two and bring joy and laughter to the lives of a copy-less couple." --Jose Arroyo (writer, Conan) "The "s-a-g-e" in Jacob's middle moniker indicates exactly that. He is a whimsically wise and hysterically funny fellow whom any child (or book buying adult) would be wise to listen to." --Dennis Miller "If you don't buy this book and then your baby dies, how are you going to feel? Pretty bad, I imagine." --Larry Doyle (writer, I Love You Beth Cooper; Go, Mutants!; The Simpsons) Have you ever read a parenting book that left you feeling inadequate and/or terrified? In other words, have you ever read any parenting book whatsoever? If so, you need How Not To Kill Your Baby, a hilarious parody of every fear-mongering, crazy-making pregnancy and parenting manual you've ever cringed over. Just consider the following advice: * "As you know if you have ever seen someone give birth in a movie or television show, all newborns emerge with adorable round faces, pudgy limbs, and twinkling eyes. If, by contrast, the nurse hands you a tiny, squawling creature with the face of an old man and skin covered in goo, hand it back immediately. There has clearly been some sort of mixup with a nearby ward for senile midgets." * "It's essential that you keep careful track of your baby's every bodily function. That way, when she is president of the United States and a paranoid-minded conspiracy movement springs up denying her eligibility for the position, you will have documentary proof that she did, in fact, poop on U.S. soil at 8:23AM on February 23." * "When choosing a nursery school, make sure to visit first, and ask the teachers about their educational philosophies. Then ask about their criminal records. If they insist they have none, you may need to keep asking, perhaps while shining a bright light in their face. Also, take their fingerprints, then follow them home from a discreet distance and go through their trash. Oh, and don't forget to thank them for their dedication to helping the young!" * "It is easy to adjust your parenting techniques as your children grow: simply do and say the exact same things, but raise your voice by one decibel for every year of your child's age." How Not To Kill Your Baby is printed on child-safe, 100% piranha-free paper, and bound without the use of exploding staples. You'll get no such promise from What To Expect When You're Expecting. How Not To Kill Your Baby is the book for you... unless you're some kind of baby-hating creep who wants to parent all wrong.
Author: Harvey Karp, M.D. Publisher: Bantam ISBN: 0307485803 Category : Family & Relationships Languages : en Pages : 250
Book Description
Perfect for expecting parents who want to provide a soothing home for the newest member of their family, The Happiest Baby on the Block, the national bestseller by respected pediatrician and child development expert Dr. Harvey Karp, is a revolutionary method for calming a crying infant and promoting healthy sleep from day one. In perhaps the most important parenting book of the decade, Dr. Harvey Karp reveals an extraordinary treasure sought by parents for centuries --an automatic “off-switch” for their baby’s crying. No wonder pediatricians across the country are praising him and thousands of Los Angeles parents, from working moms to superstars like Madonna and Pierce Brosnan, have turned to him to learn the secrets for making babies happy. Never again will parents have to stand by helpless and frazzled while their poor baby cries and cries. Dr. Karp has found there IS a remedy for colic. “I share with parents techniques known only to the most gifted baby soothers throughout history …and I explain exactly how they work.” In a innovative and thought-provoking reevaluation of early infancy, Dr. Karp blends modern science and ancient wisdom to prove that newborns are not fully ready for the world when they are born. Through his research and experience, he has developed four basic principles that are crucial for understanding babies as well as improving their sleep and soothing their senses: ·The Missing Fourth Trimester: as odd as it may sound, one of the main reasons babies cry is because they are born three months too soon. ·The Calming Reflex: the automatic reset switch to stop crying of any baby in the first few months of life. ·The 5 “S’s”: the simple steps (swaddling, side/stomach position, shushing, swinging and sucking) that trigger the calming reflex. For centuries, parents have tried these methods only to fail because, as with a knee reflex, the calming reflex only works when it is triggered in precisely the right way. Unlike other books that merely list these techniques Dr. Karp teaches parents exactly how to do them, to guide cranky infants to calm and easy babies to serenity in minutes…and help them sleep longer too. ·The Cuddle Cure: the perfect mix the 5 “S’s” that can soothe even the most colicky of infants. In the book, Dr. Karp also explains: What is colic? Why do most babies get much more upset in the evening? How can a parent calm a baby--in mere minutes? Can babies be spoiled? When should a parent of a crying baby call the doctor? How can a parent get their baby to sleep a few hours longer? Even the most loving moms and dads sometimes feel pushed to the breaking point by their infant’s persistent cries. Coming to the rescue, however, Dr. Karp places in the hands of parents, grandparents, and all childcare givers the tools they need to be able to calm their babies almost as easily as…turning off a light. From the Hardcover edition.
Author: David Sopp Publisher: Running Press ISBN: 9780762424917 Category : Humor Languages : en Pages : 16
Book Description
New parents are often overwhelmed-and befuddled-when it comes to caring for their bundle of joy. Luckily Safe Baby Handling Tips saves the day with its hilarious “do's and don'ts” on baby care. Now incompetent parents everywhere can benefit from this indispensable guide, which also includes a unique Wheel of Responsibility™ to help moms and dads negotiate baby chores (and shirk diaper duty!) whenever they can. Makes baby-rearing a blast!
Author: Aurora Brooks Publisher: BabyDreamers.net ISBN: 1991116357 Category : Health & Fitness Languages : en Pages : 40
Book Description
Introducing "The Art of Bonding: Baby Newborn Care Tips for New Parents," a comprehensive guide that will help you navigate the exciting and sometimes overwhelming journey of parenthood. Written with the needs of new parents in mind, this short read book is packed with valuable information and practical tips to ensure a strong and loving bond with your newborn. In "The Art of Bonding," you will find a wealth of knowledge on various aspects of newborn care. The book begins by emphasizing the importance of establishing skin-to-skin contact, a practice that promotes bonding and provides numerous benefits for both baby and parent. You will learn how to create a calm and safe environment for your little one, setting up a nursery that is both functional and soothing. Proper sleep is crucial for a baby's development, and this book offers valuable insights on ensuring your baby gets the sleep they need. From establishing healthy feeding habits to understanding your baby's cues and needs, you will gain a deeper understanding of your little one's unique requirements. As your baby grows, it is important to encourage their physical and cognitive development. "The Art of Bonding" provides practical tips on engaging with colors and shapes, reading and storytelling, and promoting emotional connection through responsive parenting. You will also find guidance on playing and laughing together, fostering a joyful and loving atmosphere in your home. Safety and hygiene are paramount when caring for a newborn, and this book offers valuable advice on bathing, diapering, and babyproofing your home. Additionally, it emphasizes the importance of seeking support and practicing self-care, building a support network, and taking time for yourself. "The Art of Bonding" concludes with a reminder to enjoy the journey of parenthood. It is a precious time filled with love, growth, and joy, and this book encourages you to savor every moment. With its easy-to-read format and practical advice, "The Art of Bonding" is a must-have for new parents. Whether you are expecting your first child or already navigating the early stages of parenthood, this book will equip you with the knowledge and confidence to create a strong and loving bond with your newborn. Don't miss out on this incredible opportunity! Purchase "The Art of Bonding: Baby Newborn Care Tips for New Parents" today and receive a bonus gift: "How To Be A Super Mom" absolutely free. Start your journey towards becoming the best parent you can be and enjoy the rewards of a strong and loving bond with your baby. This title is a short read. A Short Read is a type of book that is designed to be read in one quick sitting. These no fluff books are perfect for people who want an overview about a subject in a short period of time. Table of Contents The Art of Bonding: Baby Newborn Care Tips for New Parents Establishing Skin-to-Skin Contact Creating a Calm and Safe Environment Setting Up a Nursery Ensuring Proper Sleep Promoting Healthy Feeding Habits Understanding Baby's Cues and Needs Encouraging Physical Development Encouraging Cognitive Development Reading and Storytelling Engaging with Colors and Shapes Building Emotional Connection Responsive Parenting Playing and Laughing Together Ensuring Hygiene and Safety Bathing and Diapering Babyproofing Your Home Seeking Support and Self-Care Building a Support Network Taking Time for Yourself Enjoying the Journey Frequently Asked Questions
Author: Michelle Ann Abate Publisher: JHU Press ISBN: 1421438879 Category : Literary Criticism Languages : en Pages : 152
Book Description
Children's literature isn't just for children anymore. This original study explores the varied forms and roles of children's literature—when it's written for adults. What do Adam Mansbach's Go the F**k to Sleep and Barbara Park's MA! There's Nothing to Do Here! have in common? These large-format picture books are decidedly intended for parents rather than children. In No Kids Allowed, Michelle Ann Abate examines a constellation of books that form a paradoxical new genre: children's literature for adults. Distinguishing these books from YA and middle-grade fiction that appeals to adult readers, Abate argues that there is something unique about this phenomenon. Principally defined by its form and audience, children's literature, Abate demonstrates, engages with more than mere nostalgia when recast for grown-up readers. Abate examines how board books, coloring books, bedtime stories, and series detective fiction written and published specifically for adults question the boundaries of genre and challenge the assumption that adulthood and childhood are mutually exclusive.
Author: Penny Warner Publisher: Da Capo Press ISBN: 9780743236928 Category : Family & Relationships Languages : en Pages : 400
Book Description
A Helpful Mix of Baby Care Advice from Experts and Experienced Parents This may be the quickest and easiest way to obtain indispensable baby care information. In addition to authoritative tips based on the latest recommendations from the American Academy of Pediatrics, you’ll find numerous “quick tips” from experienced parents who’ve shared what worked for them. This book covers all the important topics, including: • Bonding with your baby • Babyproofing your home • Feeding, bathing, and other baby care basics • Getting your baby to sleep (and back to sleep) • Stimulating your baby’s development • Dealing with illness and accidents • Traveling with your baby • Staying connected with your partner
Author: Aurora Brooks Publisher: BabyDreamers.net ISBN: 1991116594 Category : Health & Fitness Languages : en Pages : 37
Book Description
Are you a new parent looking for expert advice on how to navigate the exciting yet challenging journey of caring for your newborn baby? Look no further! "Expert Tips for a Smooth Baby Newborn Care Journey" is the ultimate guide that will equip you with all the knowledge and skills you need to ensure a happy and healthy start for your little one. In this short read book, we have compiled a comprehensive collection of expert tips and advice from experienced pediatricians, child psychologists, and seasoned parents. With a focus on providing practical and actionable guidance, this book covers all aspects of newborn care, from establishing a routine to monitoring developmental milestones. The table of contents is designed to help you easily navigate through the book and find the information you need: Table of Contents: 1. Why Baby Newborn Care Is the Key to a Happy Baby: Discover the importance of newborn care and how it sets the foundation for your baby's overall well-being and happiness. 2. Establishing a Routine: Learn how to create a consistent and predictable schedule for your baby, including feeding, sleeping, and playtime. 3. Bonding and Attachment: Understand the significance of bonding with your baby and discover practical tips to strengthen the emotional connection between you and your little one. 4. Skin-to-Skin Contact: Explore the benefits of skin-to-skin contact and how it promotes bonding, regulates your baby's body temperature, and enhances breastfeeding. 5. Feeding and Nutrition: Get expert advice on breastfeeding, formula feeding, introducing solid foods, and ensuring your baby receives the right nutrients for healthy growth and development. 6. Sleep and Rest: Discover strategies to establish healthy sleep habits for your baby, including creating a soothing bedtime routine and managing sleep challenges. 7. Hygiene and Care: Learn essential tips for keeping your baby clean, safe, and comfortable, including bathing, diapering, and skincare. 8. Stimulating Development: Find out how to promote your baby's cognitive, physical, and social development through age-appropriate activities and play. 9. Health and Safety: Get expert guidance on keeping your baby healthy and safe, including immunizations, common illnesses, and babyproofing your home. 10. Emotional Support: Understand the emotional needs of your baby and learn how to provide a nurturing and supportive environment for their emotional well-being. 11. Monitoring Developmental Milestones: Learn about the important milestones in your baby's development and how to track their progress. 12. Conclusion: Recap the key takeaways from the book and This title is a short read. A Short Read is a type of book that is designed to be read in one quick sitting. These no fluff books are perfect for people who want an overview about a subject in a short period of time. Table of Contents Why Baby Newborn Care Is the Key to a Happy Baby Establishing a Routine Bonding and Attachment Skin-to-Skin Contact Feeding and Nutrition Sleep and Rest Hygiene and Care Stimulating Development Health and Safety Emotional Support Monitoring Developmental Milestones Conclusion Frequently Asked Questions
Author: Aurora Brooks Publisher: BabyDreamers.net ISBN: 1991116314 Category : Health & Fitness Languages : en Pages : 37
Book Description
Are you expecting a new addition to your family? Get Ready for Your Baby's Arrival: Newborn Care Tips is the ultimate guide to help you prepare for your baby's arrival and navigate the early days of parenthood. From creating a safe environment to managing postpartum emotions, this book covers all aspects of newborn care to ensure a smooth transition into parenthood. Table of Contents: 1. Creating a Safe Environment: Learn how to baby-proof your home and create a safe space for your little one to explore. 2. Feeding and Nutrition: Discover the importance of breastfeeding and introducing solids to your baby's diet. 3. Diapering and Hygiene: Find out everything you need to know about choosing the right diapers and essential diaper changing techniques. 4. Sleeping and Soothing: Create a sleep-friendly environment and learn effective soothing techniques to help your baby sleep soundly. 5. Bathing and Skincare: Choose baby-friendly skincare products and master the basics of bathing your newborn. 6. Health and Wellness: Understand the importance of well-baby checkups and learn how to address common newborn health concerns. 7. Bonding and Development: Explore the significance of bonding with your baby and discover ways to encourage their developmental milestones. 8. Self-Care for Parents: Learn how to manage postpartum emotions and prioritize self-care while caring for your newborn. 9. Frequently Asked Questions: Find answers to common questions that new parents often have. Get Ready for Your Baby's Arrival: Newborn Care Tips provides practical advice and expert tips to help you navigate the challenges of early parenthood. Whether you're a first-time parent or have previous experience, this book is a valuable resource that will empower you to confidently care for your newborn. But that's not all! As a bonus, you will also receive a FREE copy of How To Be A Super Mom. This additional guide is packed with tips and tricks to help you juggle the demands of motherhood and maintain your sanity. From time management to self-care, this book has got you covered. Don't miss out on this incredible offer! Get Ready for Your Baby's Arrival: Newborn Care Tips and How To Be A Super Mom 100% FREE. Start your journey into parenthood with confidence and be the best mom you can be. Order your copy now! This title is a short read. A Short Read is a type of book that is designed to be read in one quick sitting. These no fluff books are perfect for people who want an overview about a subject in a short period of time. Table of Contents Get Ready for Your Baby's Arrival: Newborn Care Tips Creating a Safe Environment Feeding and Nutrition Breastfeeding Basics Introducing Solids Diapering and Hygiene Choosing the Right Diapers Diaper Changing Essentials Sleeping and Soothing Creating a Sleep-Friendly Environment Soothing Techniques Bathing and Skincare Choosing Baby-Friendly Skincare Products Bathing Basics Health and Wellness Well-Baby Checkups Common Newborn Health Concerns Bonding and Development Importance of Bonding Encouraging Developmental Milestones Self-Care for Parents Managing Postpartum Emotions Importance of Rest and Support Frequently Asked Questions
Author: David Sopp
Author: Jacob Sager Weinstein
Author: Harvey Karp, M.D.
Author: David Sopp
Author: Aurora Brooks
Author: Michelle Ann Abate
Author: Penny Warner
Author: Signe Larson
Author: Aurora Brooks
Author: Aurora Brooks