My Middle-Aged Baby Book PDF Download

Author: Mary-Lou Weisman
Publisher: Workman Publishing
ISBN: 0761177477
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 91

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Book Description
Mimicking the popular format of baby books, a gently satirical celebration of middle age offers space to record Memorable Firsts--liver spot, conservative opinion--Primary Care givers--Manicurist, Hair Colorist--and other indications of the onset of mid-life.

Author: Mary-Lou Weisman
Publisher: Workman Publishing
ISBN: 9781563058172
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 84

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Book Description
First lost tooth. First colonoscopy. First second mortgage. First chin hair. First comb-over. All of these memorable firsts belong in MY MIDDLE-AGED BABY BOOK: A Place to Write Down All the Things You'll Soon Forget. A padded and chewable keepsake with room to write in significant firsts, it's a perfect gift for a milestone birthday, when you're old enough not to take yourself too seriously. ?A comic classic, My Middle-Aged Baby Book is the irrepressibly cheeky celebration of middle age in the form of a fill-in baby book--and the perfect gift for both women ("Is it hot in here, or is it just me?") and men (remember, it's prostate not prostrate). It's a place to record firsts: my first colonoscopy, my first reading glasses, my first words ("everything hurts"). Vital statistics: including married name(s), circumference of abdomen, cholesterol count (bad HDLs, good HDLs). Primary caregivers: urologist, periodontist, colorist. It explains the Seven Stages of Hair Loss, answers the question Am I Smiling . . . or Is It Gas?, covers Sex? (Check one: Yes, No, Can't Remember), and what happens When I Grow Up--go ahead, be a burden to your children! ?And for everyone who forgot where they put their reading glasses, the book is thoughtfully printed on anti-glare paper in large, easy-to-read type.

Author: Karen Katz
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 141693622X
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 14

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Book Description
How many kisses does a tired baby need to change her from crying into sleeping?

Author: Ruth Yunker
Publisher: Diamond Publishing House
ISBN: 9781736882207
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 218

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Book Description
". . . humorous and wisdom-filled life lessons; invaluable to anyone hurtling toward that third trimester of life." - IndieReader With one entertaining and thought-provoking story after the other, Ruth Yunker describes her own road traveled to middle age. Now growing old is in sight. Rather than panicking, Yunker realizes this newest phase of her life is going to be an extraordinary journey, if she chooses to embrace it. Yunker has lived a multi-faceted and well-traveled life. She was a perennial New Kid at school. To her horror, she was the very last girl in her class to get a bra. She compares her infant's heads just after birth lying quietly on her chest, to her mother's head, moments after her death, lolling oh so heavily in the same place. She writes of nervously informing her grown daughter she is getting a facelift. She writes about her eyebrows turning white, about the deaths of President Kennedy and John Lennon, about eating with one's hands, and the sudden need for this thing called Spanx. She mourns losing her power in the grocery store check out line, and triumphs in getting it back. Ruth Yunker has found the way to tackle the coming of old age that promises to be a fabulous continuation of the joy-filled life she's living now. She plans to use optimism, power and humor, to carry her through. Her newest book "Baby, I'm the Boss of Me" tells you how you can too.

Author: Mary-Lou Weisman
Publisher: Workman Publishing
ISBN: 9780761143840
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 96

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Book Description
Congratulations, baby boomers: You are now officially all middle-aged. ItÕs a book of firsts: My first colonoscopy, my first reading glasses. A book of vital statistics, including married name(s), circumference of abdomen, cholesterol count (HDL and LDL), and home state (Red or Blue). ItÕs a place to keep track of primary care giversÑherbalist, psychopharmacologist. Record favorite expressionsÑIÕm having a senior moment. Dressing on the side, please. 60 is the new 50. Keep track of ÒWhat IÕve Grown,Ó from liver spots to knee flaps. ThereÕs also a place for a lock of hair (if you can spare it) along with the Seven Stages of Hair Loss (men: from minoxidil to shaves head; women: from plucks grey hairs to dyes it champagne blond). Plus essaysÑÒAm I Smiling or Is It Gas,Ó and ÒI Go to School,Ó a parody of Adult Ed classes.

Author:
Publisher: Running Press Adult
ISBN: 9780671317331
Category : Games & Activities
Languages : en
Pages : 0

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Book Description
Now recording the highlights of your baby's first year is easy and fun! 1. Paste a photo of your baby's smiling face on the inside back cover. 2. Use a permanent marker to record major milestones during your baby's first year, from the day of birth to the first birthday. Just think how much fun it will be to read this delightful journal when your baby is two, three, four, five, or when your "baby" gets married and has children of his or her own.

Author: Ruth Yunker
Publisher: Outskirts Press
ISBN: 1478787899
Category : Biography & Autobiography
Languages : en
Pages : 217

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Book Description
“Baby, I’m the Boss of Me” is author Ruth Yunker’s humorous, heartfelt and unique take on the power and joy of growing older while maintaining one’s sanity, humor, and joie de vivre. With one entertaining and thought-provoking story after the other, Ruth Yunker describes her own road traveled to middle age. Now growing old is in sight. Rather than panicking, Yunker realizes this newest phase of her life is going to be an extraordinary journey, if she chooses to embrace it. Yunker has lived a multi-faceted and well-traveled life. She was a perennial New Kid at school. To her horror, she was the very last girl in her class to get a bra. She compares her infants heads just after birth lying quietly on her chest, to her mother’s head, moments after her death, lolling oh so heavily in the same place. She writes of nervously informing her grown daughter she is getting a facelift. She writes about her eyebrows turning white, about the deaths of President Kennedy and John Lennon, about eating with one’s hands, and the sudden need for this thing called Spanx. She mourns losing her power in the grocery store check out line, and triumphs in getting it back. Ruth Yunker has found the way to tackle the coming of old age that promises to be a fabulous continuation of the joy-filled life she’s living now. She plans to use optimism, power and humor, to carry her through. Her newest book “Baby, I’m the Boss of Me” tells you how you can too.

Author: Rachel Greener
Publisher: Penguin
ISBN: 0593324862
Category : Juvenile Nonfiction
Languages : en
Pages : 32

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Book Description
This inclusive guide to how every family begins is an honest, cheerful tool for conversations between parents and their young ones. To make a baby you need one egg, one sperm, and one womb. But every family starts in its own special way. This book answers the "Where did I come from?" question no matter who the reader is and how their life began. From all different kinds of conception through pregnancy to the birth itself, this candid and cozy guide is just right for the first conversations that parents will have with their children about how babies are made.

Author: Harriet Ziefert
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781609051082
Category : Animals
Languages : en
Pages : 0

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Book Description
Baby animals have names that are different than their parents as kids will learn in this colorful and lively board book story. 8 spreads.

Author: Irene O'Book
Publisher: HarperFestival
ISBN: 9780694008728
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 14

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Book Description
Maybe My Baby For babies who are fascinated by faces of other babies, here is a love poem from parent to child perfect for sharing.Dancer, astronaut, builder, athlete—what will baby grow up to be? Here is a love poem from parent to child, illustrated in a way that babies love—with funny photos of other babies. Irene O’Book is a poet and artist. This is her first book for children. She lives in Garrison, NY. Dancer, astronaut, builder, athlete—what will baby grow up to be? Here is a love poem from parent to child, illustrated in a way that babies love—with funny photos of other babies. Irene O’Book is a poet and artist. This is her first book for children. She lives in Garrison, NY.