Kids Say the Cutest Things When They're Drunk PDF Download
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Author: Dan McQuinn Publisher: ISBN: 9780983255307 Category : Humor Languages : en Pages : 220
Book Description
Kids Say the Cutest Things When They're Drunk, the first book from humor writer, Dan McQuinn, is a sharply written collection of comic letters, monologues and playlets that provides sure-fire laughs drunk or sober. The 50+ comic essays draw their humor from every phase of life as imagined by McQuinn from the moment his parents meet for the first time to his bizarre final wishes.
Author: Dan McQuinn Publisher: ISBN: 9780983255307 Category : Humor Languages : en Pages : 220
Book Description
Kids Say the Cutest Things When They're Drunk, the first book from humor writer, Dan McQuinn, is a sharply written collection of comic letters, monologues and playlets that provides sure-fire laughs drunk or sober. The 50+ comic essays draw their humor from every phase of life as imagined by McQuinn from the moment his parents meet for the first time to his bizarre final wishes.
Author: Jeff Vogel Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing ISBN: 9780740750458 Category : Family & Relationships Languages : en Pages : 278
Book Description
Author Jeff Vogel did not go into parenthood with any delusions. He knew that he would love his daughter, and that was terrifying. What if he screwed up? And he knew that life with a baby would be different, that it would be filled with an endless stream of filthy diapers, unexplained wailing, and sleepless nights. Not to mention no sex. The parenting books painted a picture of smart, communicative babies and mindless, limitless joy, but he knew they were lying to him. So he wrote his own book. The Poo Bomb: True Tales of Parental Terror recounts, in a no-punches-pulled style, the first year of life of Cordelia, Jeff's freshly hatched, gooey human girl. The first year of parenthood isn't about joy or fulfillment. It is about menial labor, wiping up human waste, and marking time until the kid is old enough to run and play and thank you for its life. Jeff chronicles the journey through the morass of year one week by week. Rich with irreverent honesty and humor, The Poo Bomb is the reality show of parenting books: It reflects what most parents have sometimes guiltily felt about their not-so-delightful bundles of joy.
Author: Lyra Selene Publisher: Scholastic Inc. ISBN: 1338210041 Category : Young Adult Fiction Languages : en Pages : 362
Book Description
In a magical world where the sun never sets, a gifted girl dreams to be in the royal court but once inside, she may not be prepared for the drama. Sylvie has always known she deserves more. Out in the permanent twilight of the Dusklands, her guardians called her power to create illusions a curse. But Sylvie knows it gives her a place in Coeur d’Or, the palais of the Amber Empress and her highborn legacies. So Sylvie sets off toward the Amber City, a glittering jewel under a sun that never sets, to take what is hers. But her hope for a better life is quickly dimmed. The empress invites her in only as part of a wicked wager among her powerful courtiers. Sylvie must assume a new name, Mirage, and begin to navigate secretive social circles and deadly games of intrigue in order to claim her spot. Soon it becomes apparent that nothing is as it appears and no one, including her cruel yet captivating sponsor, Sunder, will answer her questions. As Mirage strives to seize what should be her rightful place, she’ll have to consider whether it is worth the price she must pay . . . Lyra Selene weaves a lush and thrilling story of sacrifice, secrets, and star-crossed love set in a Parisian-inspired world where the sun never sets in this remarkable YA fantasy debut. Praise for Amber & Dusk “A shimmering tapestry of language, woven through with soaring beauty and subtle menace.” —Sara Holland, New York Times–bestselling author of the Everless series “Full of riotous color, fantastical locations, and surprising plot twists.” —School Library Journal
Author: Cathrine Ann Publisher: BPS Books ISBN: 1926645731 Category : Biography & Autobiography Languages : en Pages : 336
Book Description
Unwanted and neglected as a child, abused by neighborhood perverts beginning at six years old, and then by loser boyfriends during her adolescence and beyond, Cathrine Ann became pregnant at fifteen, was pimped out by her rich uncle at seventeen, was jailed at eighteen, and lived as a prostitute in her thirties. But today she is the founder and president of a multi-million-dollar company. How did that happen? Beautiful Buttons is a rough, raw, candid, and surprisingly funny testament to the resilience of the human spirit -- an inspiring and empowering self-portrait of a life lived and redeemed.
Author: ZZ Packer Publisher: Penguin ISBN: 9781573223782 Category : Fiction Languages : en Pages : 292
Book Description
The acclaimed debut short story collection that introduced the world to an arresting and unforgettable new voice in fiction, from multi-award winning author ZZ Packer Her impressive range and talent are abundantly evident: Packer dazzles with her command of language, surprising and delighting us with unexpected turns and indelible images, as she takes us into the lives of characters on the periphery, unsure of where they belong. We meet a Brownie troop of black girls who are confronted with a troop of white girls; a young man who goes with his father to the Million Man March and must decide where his allegiance lies; an international group of drifters in Japan, who are starving, unable to find work; a girl in a Baltimore ghetto who has dreams of the larger world she has seen only on the screens in the television store nearby, where the Lithuanian shopkeeper holds out hope for attaining his own American Dream. With penetrating insight, ZZ Packer helps us see the world with a clearer vision. Fresh, versatile, and captivating, Drinking Coffee Elsewhere is a striking and unforgettable collection, sure to stand out among the contemporary canon of fiction.
Author: Kimberly Lemming Publisher: Orbit ISBN: 0316570265 Category : Fiction Languages : en Pages : 204
Book Description
Spice trader Cinnamon’s quiet life is turned upside down when she ends up on a quest with a fiery demon, in this irreverently quirky rom-com fantasy that is sweet, steamy, and funny as hell. All she wanted to do was live her life in peace—maybe get a cat, expand the family spice farm. Really, anything that didn’t involve going on an adventure where an orc might rip her face off. But they say the goddess has favorites, and if so, Cin is clearly not one of them. After Cin saves the demon Fallon in a wine-drunk stupor, Fallon reveals that all he really wants to do is kill an evil witch enslaving his people. And who can blame him? But now he’s dragging Cinnamon along for the ride whether she likes it or not. On the bright side, at least he keeps burning off his shirt.…
Author: Charlotte Byrd Publisher: Byrd Book Llc ISBN: 1632251515 Category : Fiction Languages : en Pages : 200
Book Description
“Addictive and impossible to put down.” -Goodreads review ★★★★★ This was supposed to be so easy. We go out west and start a new life. But then a gun goes off and everything changes. What happens now? How do we get through this? My hopes start to evaporate with each passing moment. But as long as Tyler is breathing, I have to keep fighting. I am fighting for both of us now. But is that enough? Praise for Charlotte Byrd “BEST AUTHOR YET! Charlotte has done it again! There is a reason she is an amazing author and she continues to prove it! I was definitely not disappointed in this series!!” ★★★★★ “LOVE!!! I loved this book and the whole series!!! I just wish it didn't have to end. I am definitely a fan for life!!! ★★★★★ “Extremely captivating, sexy, steamy, intriguing, and intense!” ★★★★★ “Addictive and impossible to put down.” ★★★★★ “What a magnificent story from the 1st book through book 6 it never slowed down always surprising the reader in one way or the other. Nicholas and Olive's paths crossed in a most unorthodox way and that's how their story begins it's exhilarating with that nail biting suspense that keeps you riding on the edge the whole series. You'll love it!” ★★★★★ “What is Love Worth. This is a great epic ending to this series. Nicholas and Olive have a deep connection and the mystery surrounding the deaths of the people he is accused of murdering is to be read. Olive is one strong woman with deep convictions. The twists, angst, confusion is all put together to make this worthwhile read.” ★★★★★ “Fast-paced romantic suspense filled with twists and turns, danger, betrayal, and so much more.” ★★★★★ “Decadent, delicious, & dangerously addictive!” - Amazon Review ★★★★★ “Titillation so masterfully woven, no reader can resist its pull. A MUST-BUY!” - Bobbi Koe, Amazon Review ★★★★★ “Captivating!” - Crystal Jones, Amazon Review ★★★★★ “Sexy, secretive, pulsating chemistry…” - Mrs. K, Amazon Reviewer ★★★★★ “Charlotte Byrd is a brilliant writer. I've read loads and I've laughed and cried. She writes a balanced book with brilliant characters. Well done!” -Amazon Review ★★★★★ “Hot, steamy, and a great storyline.” - Christine Reese ★★★★★ “My oh my....Charlotte has made me a fan for life.” - JJ, Amazon Reviewer ★★★★★ “Wow. Just wow. Charlotte Byrd leaves me speechless and humble… It definitely kept me on the edge of my seat. Once you pick it up, you won't put it down.” - Amazon Review ★★★★★ “ Intrigue, lust, and great characters...what more could you ask for?!” - Dragonfly Lady ★★★★★
Author: Robert W. Littlefield Publisher: AuthorHouse ISBN: 1452054940 Category : Fiction Languages : en Pages : 374
Book Description
Bobby Fowler is the first and only out gay kid at Dunston High School. Unathletic and small for his age, Bobby was orphaned soon after moving from New England to Dunston, a ranching town in central Texas, just before freshman year. Deeply scarred from a near-fatal beating during sophomore year, Bobby finds solace in his drums, composing music, and his two closest friends. Only two types of students go to Dunston High School, according to his soul mate, Chloe: football players, and those who adore them. And Bobby, along with every girl in school and every woman in town, for that matter, adores one football player in particular. Kyle Faulkner, the star quarterback, has it all, and not just because his heroics brought home a state championship to his football-crazed town. With stunning good looks, a muscular physique, a dazzling Hollywood smile and a winning personality, it's no surprise that Kyle is a god in school. Kyle, along with everyone else, thinks of himself as the ultimate straight boy, the guy every girl wants to date. But Kyle has secret that he can't even admit to himself. He never asks himself why he sneaks peeks at the Gay Kid or why he dreams of wrapping his arms around him. But just a few weeks before graduation, Kyle finds out why during an unexpected and violent encounter with Bobby. It is an encounter which causes Kyle to admit the unthinkable. And unless Bobby can convince him there is a way out of the trap he thinks he's in, their encounter will lead to a terrifying climax that could cost both boys their lives.
Author: Dan McQuinn
Author: Dan McQuinn
Author: Jeff Vogel
Author: Lyra Selene
Author: Anson R. Nash, Jr.
Author: Cathrine Ann
Author: ZZ Packer
Author: Kimberly Lemming
Author: Uta Hagen
Author: Charlotte Byrd
Author: Robert W. Littlefield