I'm Bernadette! PDF Download

Author: Emily Grace Ortega
Publisher: CreateSpace
ISBN: 9781492932840
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 116

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Book Description
Bernadette doesn't know what to do when the principal, Sister Teresa Jerome, announces that her school will celebrate All Saints' Day with saint costumes. That means no Halloween costumes and no princess dress for Bernadette! Everyone else is excited about finding a great saint costume. But Bernadette doesn't want to think about it. And to make things worse, her two younger brothers seem to be determined to make trouble for her at home! But with the help of her family, she's hoping to find the best saint for the first annual All Saints' Day parade!

Author: Hanna Alkaf
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 153449460X
Category : Young Adult Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 283

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Book Description
An all-girls school is struck with mysterious cases of screaming hysteria in this chilling dark academia thriller haunted by a deeply buried history clawing to the light. For over a hundred years, girls have fought to attend St. Bernadette’s, with its reputation for shaping only the best and brightest young women. Unfortunately, there is also the screaming. When a student begins to scream in the middle of class, a chain reaction starts that impacts the entire school. By the end of the day, seventeen girls are affected—along with St. Bernadette’s stellar reputation. Khadijah’s got her own scars to tend to, and watching her friends succumb to hysteria only rips apart wounds she’d rather keep closed. But when her sister falls to the screams, Khad knows she’s the only one who can save her. Rachel has always been far too occupied trying to reconcile her overbearing mother’s expectations with her own secret ambitions to pay attention to school antics. But just as Rachel finds her voice, it turns into screams. Together, the two girls find themselves digging deeper into the school’s dark history, hunting for the truth. Little do they know that a specter lurks in the darkness, watching, waiting, and hungry for its next victim…

Author: Denis Deasy
Publisher: Grosvenor House Publishing
ISBN: 1786236796
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 230

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Book Description
Harry's world is changing. He's sixteen with a job and a bank account, which is just as well as he needs the dosh to buy more Thomas the Tank Engine DVDs and kit kats. But how will Harry cope with the daunting prospect of a residential school placement? Can visits to see Peckham's outstanding traffic lights and Aldershot's world class charity shops ease his stress? Or will his blossoming romance with Bernadette prove to be the real help he needs to face an uncertain future?

Author: Dale McGowan
Publisher: Xlibris Corporation
ISBN: 1462832407
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 367

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Book Description
Theres only one real taboo left in 21st Century America, and Jack Kassels got it bad. He doesnt believe in God. And even that might be all right if he didnt teach at the College of Saint Bernadette, but he does. Nothing is more important to Jack than reason, the triumph of truth over comforting fantasies, but Saint Bernies is the land of created realities, where critical thoughts go to die. When his oldest partner in disbelief shows up as the campus priest, Jack edges nearer the abyss, finally plunging over when his ex-wife enrolls their brilliant young son in a Lutheran school and the boy begins quoting Scripture in response to Jacks questions. Back against the wall, Jack starts to come out as a non-believer at what turns out to be the worst possible time --- as an alleged vision of the Virgin Mary turns the college into a holy pilgrimage site. A novel of principles and substance...CALLING BERNADETTES BLUFF is surprising not in the form but in the execution --- in boldness, in originality, in the spit and shine of the prose The president, the philosopher, the priestess, and the priest nail us again and again by sentences, as it were, fired by builders gunsAll thats superfluous burns, as readers become powder, fuse, and match. --- Robert Grunst, author of The Smallest Bird in North America "Wicked funny...CALLING BERNADETTES BLUFF cleverly captures some of the primary paradoxes of contemporary American life, especially our humble human yearning for truth in an age of absurdity. The hilarious answer to what might happen if David Lodge met David Foster Wallace on a Wendy Wasserstein set." --- Cecilia Konchar Farr, author of Dancing Through the Doctrine "Entertaining, insightful...genuinely brilliant." --- Theresa Ostrom, author of The Folding Year "CALLING BERNADETTES BLUFF is an undoubted triumph of academic satire...in excellent company with other satirical novels of academe; from David Lodge to Jane Smiley, from Malcolm Bradbury to James Hynes, Dale McGowan is easily their match in wit and depth. [Its a] mightily funny sendup of faith and letters...but Bernadettes Bluff is also a delightful, insightful investigation into the heart of faith of a different kind, of the universal human need for a belief system, of the search for truth and meaning and a life lived honestly." --- Sharon Schulz-Elsing, Curled Up With a Good Book reviews This remarkable debut novel diverts the full force of the postmodern whirlwind onto a tiny fictional college on the Minnesota prairie, with results both thought-provoking and hilarious. Nonsense of every color --- political, religious, ideological --- finds fertile ground within the gates of St. Bernies, a college perched precariously on a bizarre land formation of unknown origins, known (tellingly) as The Wedge. Author Dale McGowan puts the tiny trumpet of reason into the unsteady hands of Jack John Kassel, philosopher and humanist, whose attempts to live with a little intellectual integrity are shaken as much by the antics of his erstwhile allies as by his intellectual opponents. McGowan creates characters that are at once recognizable and absurd: the atheist priest, the New-Agey college president, the feminist warrior (and Leonard the Poet, who sublimates his love for her by reading dirty Chaucer), Satanists, liturgical cheerleaders, singing nuns... all with cards against the vest and each other in their crosshairs. The dialogue moves from classical philosophy to cheesy pop culture with merciless speed and devastating wit. On the surface its riotous entertainment, but for weeks after you close the cover this remarkable book will resonate in your head, tickling the mind in lovely and unfamiliar places.

Author: Nicky Silver
Publisher: Theatre Communications Group
ISBN: 155936761X
Category : Drama
Languages : en
Pages : 109

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Book Description
With sharp comic turns and absurdist twists, Raised in Captivity explores the guilt, self-punishment, and redemption in the lives of two estranged and equally odd siblings when they reunite at the funeral of their mother--whose demise was caused by nothing less than an errant showerhead.

Author: Mazey Eddings
Publisher: St. Martin's Griffin
ISBN: 1250806011
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 256

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Book Description
Mazey Eddings, author of the “witty, fast-paced rom-com”* A Brush with Love, mixes passion and humor to create a luscious love story between two people stumbling through life and learning to open their hearts in Lizzie Blake’s Best Mistake. Lizzie has made endless mistakes. Kitchen fires, pyramid schemes, bangs (of the hair and human variety), you name it, she’s done it... and made a mess of it too. One mistake she’s never made is letting anyone get closer to her than a single hook-up. But after losing yet another bakery job due to her uncontrolled ADHD, she breaks her cardinal rule and has a two-night-stand that changes everything. Once burned, twice shy, Rake has given up on relationships. And feelings. And any form of intimacy for that matter. Yet something about charming, chaotic Lizzie has him lowering his guard. For two nights, that is. Then it’s back home to Australia and far away from the pesky feelings Lizzie pulls from him. But when Lizzie tells him she’s got an unexpected bun in the oven, he’ll do whatever it takes to be a part of his child’s life... except be emotionally vulnerable, obviously. He’s never going to make that mistake again. Through a series of mishaps, totally “platonic” single bed sharing, and an underground erotic baking scheme, Lizzie and Rake learn that even the biggest mistakes can have the most beautiful consequences. *USA Today bestselling author Evie Dunmore

Author: Gisele G. Barbosa
Publisher: The power of fate
ISBN: 9781594050909
Category : Drama
Languages : en
Pages : 684

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Book Description
This is the story of the irresistible chemistry of Destiny, and the love of a man and a woman . . . a bond they could not understand . . . a journey they never suspected. Who will win, Fate or Family? Their story is the continuance of one begun four hundred years before at the crossroad of Fate. But today, Marcel and Monique must struggle to realize the fruits of their powerful feelings.

Author: Kitty Burns Florey
Publisher: Houghton Mifflin Harcourt
ISBN: 9780156034432
Category : Language Arts & Disciplines
Languages : en
Pages : 180

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Book Description
A veteran copyeditor studies the practice of diagramming sentences in a charming and funny look back at its odd history, its elegant method, and its rich, ongoing possibilities.

Author: Susan Crosby
Publisher: Harlequin
ISBN: 1426808798
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 282

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Book Description
THERE WAS A HOT-LOOKING MAN IN HER KITCHEN. AND HE WAS COOKING! Maureen Hart had never had a summer so crazy…not even the year she'd become a teenage unwed mother. Now her life was on track with a steady boyfriend and a big promotion looming. And the one person who could derail everything was now waiting on her doorstep! Maureen's estranged daughter desperately needed her to care for her six-year-old son for several months. She just never imagined when she said yes that the child's gorgeous paternal grandfather, Daniel, would insist on staying, as well. Quarters were getting interestingly close. But Maureen was technically almost engaged…and a workaholic…and a control freak. And totally about to cut loose and indulge in a little fun with a man capable of doing his own laundry!

Author: Trice Hickman
Publisher: Dafina
ISBN: 1496709322
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 273

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Book Description
After one too many failed relationships, businesswoman Bernadette Gibson is resigned to singlehood. Yet on the heels of her 50th birthday she meets Cooper "Coop" Dennis, a charismatic nightclub owner who literally sweeps her off her feet. But just as they're ready to make the ultimate commitment, a secret from Coop's past threatens to end their relationship.