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F My Life

F My Life PDF Author: Maxime Valette
Publisher: Villard
ISBN: 0345520114
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 290

Book Description
Today, my boss fired me via text message. I don’t have a text messaging plan. I paid 25 cents to get fired. Your girlfriend dumped you, your car broke down, your boss passed you up for the big promotion. Life’s not fair, but there is one sure-fire way to ease your pain–laughing at someone else who had an even worse day than you did. Enter the devastatingly funny world of F My Life, where calamity is comedy. Covering every disastrous pratfall in love, work, family-life, and more, F My Life proffers other people’s ruinous, real-life happenings to brighten your gloomiest day: someone getting dumped through a greeting card, ignored at their birthday party, or insulted by their own grandmother. Spanning everything from ironic twists of fate to down-right shameful moments, F My Life’s squirm-inducing stories are schadenfreude at its finest. So today, take solace in knowing that at least you’re not that guy. There now, don’t you feel better? Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. I cried and told him that I loved him. He gave me a quarter and told me to call someone who cared. I threw the quarter in his face and ran. I waited for the bus, but when I got on, I realized I was 25 cents short of the fare. I walked home in the rain. Today, my mom walked in on me looking at a 1978 Playboy. She asked if I found it in the basement. I said yes. Then I realized she was the centerfold. Today, I got in line at the grocery store. The woman in front of me looked right at me, turned to her friend, and said “That reminds me, I forgot to get acne cream.”

F My Life

F My Life PDF Author: Maxime Valette
Publisher: Villard
ISBN: 0345520114
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 290

Book Description
Today, my boss fired me via text message. I don’t have a text messaging plan. I paid 25 cents to get fired. Your girlfriend dumped you, your car broke down, your boss passed you up for the big promotion. Life’s not fair, but there is one sure-fire way to ease your pain–laughing at someone else who had an even worse day than you did. Enter the devastatingly funny world of F My Life, where calamity is comedy. Covering every disastrous pratfall in love, work, family-life, and more, F My Life proffers other people’s ruinous, real-life happenings to brighten your gloomiest day: someone getting dumped through a greeting card, ignored at their birthday party, or insulted by their own grandmother. Spanning everything from ironic twists of fate to down-right shameful moments, F My Life’s squirm-inducing stories are schadenfreude at its finest. So today, take solace in knowing that at least you’re not that guy. There now, don’t you feel better? Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. I cried and told him that I loved him. He gave me a quarter and told me to call someone who cared. I threw the quarter in his face and ran. I waited for the bus, but when I got on, I realized I was 25 cents short of the fare. I walked home in the rain. Today, my mom walked in on me looking at a 1978 Playboy. She asked if I found it in the basement. I said yes. Then I realized she was the centerfold. Today, I got in line at the grocery store. The woman in front of me looked right at me, turned to her friend, and said “That reminds me, I forgot to get acne cream.”

What the F*@# Should I Do with My Life?

What the F*@# Should I Do with My Life? PDF Author: Zach Golden
Publisher: Running Press Adult
ISBN: 0762496355
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 180

Book Description
Answering the Existential Question of What the F*@# to Do with Your Life with Spot-On Humor (and Profanity) If you've tried and failed to find your purpose in life, you're going to need expert help. From the author of What the F*@# Should I Make For Dinner?, this laugh-out-loud career guide will set you straight. Take a brief career quiz to find your perfect match, and get the inside scoop on a wide variety of crappy careers, plus tips on breaking in, leaving you with no excuse not to embark on a fulfilling vocation as: Electrician Therapist T-Shirt Cannon Operator Dental Hygienist Mortician Lobbyist . . . And more. And don't worry: if that perfect career eludes or you fail at everything else, you can always be a realtor.

The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck

The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck PDF Author: Mark Manson
Publisher: HarperCollins
ISBN: 006245773X
Category : Self-Help
Languages : en
Pages : 197

Book Description
#1 New York Times Bestseller Over 10 million copies sold In this generation-defining self-help guide, a superstar blogger cuts through the crap to show us how to stop trying to be "positive" all the time so that we can truly become better, happier people. For decades, we’ve been told that positive thinking is the key to a happy, rich life. "F**k positivity," Mark Manson says. "Let’s be honest, shit is f**ked and we have to live with it." In his wildly popular Internet blog, Manson doesn’t sugarcoat or equivocate. He tells it like it is—a dose of raw, refreshing, honest truth that is sorely lacking today. The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k is his antidote to the coddling, let’s-all-feel-good mindset that has infected American society and spoiled a generation, rewarding them with gold medals just for showing up. Manson makes the argument, backed both by academic research and well-timed poop jokes, that improving our lives hinges not on our ability to turn lemons into lemonade, but on learning to stomach lemons better. Human beings are flawed and limited—"not everybody can be extraordinary, there are winners and losers in society, and some of it is not fair or your fault." Manson advises us to get to know our limitations and accept them. Once we embrace our fears, faults, and uncertainties, once we stop running and avoiding and start confronting painful truths, we can begin to find the courage, perseverance, honesty, responsibility, curiosity, and forgiveness we seek. There are only so many things we can give a f**k about so we need to figure out which ones really matter, Manson makes clear. While money is nice, caring about what you do with your life is better, because true wealth is about experience. A much-needed grab-you-by-the-shoulders-and-look-you-in-the-eye moment of real-talk, filled with entertaining stories and profane, ruthless humor, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k is a refreshing slap for a generation to help them lead contented, grounded lives.

The Life-Changing Magic of Not Giving a F**k

The Life-Changing Magic of Not Giving a F**k PDF Author: Sarah Knight
Publisher: Hachette UK
ISBN: 1784298492
Category : Self-Help
Languages : en
Pages : 126

Book Description
The word-of-mouth bestseller * Published in more than 30 countries * 3 million copies sold worldwide Are you stressed out, overbooked and underwhelmed by life? Fed up with pleasing everyone else before you please yourself? Finding it hard working from home? Then it's time to stop giving a f**k, and care less to get more. This irreverent and practical book explains how to rid yourself of unwanted obligations, shame, and guilt - and give your f**ks instead to people and things that make you happy. From family dramas to having a bikini body, the simple 'NotSorry Method' for mental decluttering will help you unleash the power of not giving a f**k and will free you to spend your time, energy and money on the things that really matter. 'The anti-guru' Observer 'Absolutely blinding. Read it. Do it.' Mail on Sunday 'Genius' Cosmopolitan 'I love Knight's book even before I start reading . . . Works a charm' Sunday Times Magazine 'Life-affirming . . . The key practice she advocates is devising for yourself a "fuck budget" . . . It's a beautiful way of streamlining your psyche' Lucy Mangan, Guardian ALSO AVAILABLE FROM SARAH KNIGHT: YOU DO YOU: how to be who you are and use what you've got to get what you want AND Get Your Sh*t Together - the New York Times bestseller helping you organise the f**ks you want and need to give

You Have No F**king Idea

You Have No F**king Idea PDF Author: Matt Baier
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1682613348
Category : Biography & Autobiography
Languages : en
Pages : 160

Book Description
Deadbeat Dad. Con Artist. Liar. Manipulator. If you believe the tabloid press about Teen Mom OG star Amber Portwood’s fiancé Matt Baier, your opinions of him are most likely wrapped in scandalous rumors and gossip. Forget everything you think you know about the tattooed, gravel-voiced reality TV star. In You Have No F**king Idea, Matt breaks his silence for the first time and sets the story straight by delving into his past, present and future—fully exposing the naked truth about his life—once and for all.

Buy Yourself the F*cking Lilies

Buy Yourself the F*cking Lilies PDF Author: Tara Schuster
Publisher: Dial Press
ISBN: 0525509895
Category : Self-Help
Languages : en
Pages : 352

Book Description
Brutally honest, often hilarious, hard-won lessons in learning to love and care for yourself from a former vice president at Comedy Central who was called “ahead of her time” by Jordan Peele “You’re going to want Tara Schuster to become your new best friend.”—Glennon Doyle, #1 New York Times bestselling author of Untamed “Compelling, persuasive, and useful no matter where you are in your life.”—Chelsea Handler, #1 New York Times bestselling author of Life Will Be the Death of Me By the time she was in her late twenties, Tara Schuster was a rising TV executive who had worked for The Daily Show with Jon Stewart and helped launch Key & Peele to viral superstardom. By all appearances, she had mastered being a grown-up. But beneath that veneer of success, she was a chronically anxious, self-medicating mess. No one knew that her road to adulthood had been paved with depression, anxiety, and shame, owing in large part to her minimally parented upbringing. She realized she’d hit rock bottom when she drunk-dialed her therapist pleading for help. Buy Yourself the F*cking Lilies is the story of Tara’s path to re-parenting herself and becoming a “ninja of self-love.” Through simple, daily rituals, Tara transformed her mind, body, and relationships, and shows how to • fake gratitude until you actually feel gratitude • excavate your emotional wounds and heal them with kindness • identify your self-limiting beliefs, kick them to the curb, and start living a life you choose • silence your inner frenemy and shield yourself from self-criticism • carve out time each morning to start your day empowered, inspired, and ready to rule • create a life you truly, totally f*cking LOVE This is the book Tara wished someone had given her and it is the book many of us desperately need: a candid, hysterical, addictively readable, practical guide to growing up (no matter where you are in life) and learning to love yourself in a non-throw-up-in-your-mouth-it’s-so-cheesy way.

Five Fs of Life

Five Fs of Life PDF Author: Tuan Ta
Publisher:
ISBN: 9780984472000
Category : Business & Economics
Languages : en
Pages : 50

Book Description
Five Fs of Life was written for busy people who would like to apply a straight forward strategy to balance their lives in 30 minutes. In particular, the book was for professionals to read during a 30 minute flight and to be pass on to other people who are in a stressful or feeling that they only have 30 minutes to spare.

Win Your F*cking Life Back

Win Your F*cking Life Back PDF Author: Skylar DeRouen
Publisher: Think Smart Financials
ISBN:
Category : Business & Economics
Languages : en
Pages : 202

Book Description
Have you ever heard the saying "money can't buy happiness "? Well, it's bulls*it. Why do we spend 40+ hours per week working if the goal of monetary gain doesn't make you happy? Let's be honest and call it what it is, money is simply a tool to provide you with opportunity. These favorable circumstances open doors and provide you the ability to focus on your passions. You have the ability to attain a 6 or 7 figure net worth, you just need a proven pathway to get there. Imagine how much more free your life would be. This book will give you all the necessary tools to reach your financial goals with the focus on three financial pillars: budgeting, investing, and getting out of debt. Also, I will show you how to build multiple streams of income. International travel can be daunting to the untrained eye. This book will give you the critical tools to get you from your house to your most desired exotic location. After you are walked through how to get a passport, I will show you the best places to buy your plane tickets. You will be presented vital tips, such as countries to travel to first. I call these “training wheel” countries. Lastly, what are the 10 Travel Commandants? Trust me when I tell you these are vital pieces of advice that will save you money, time, and embarrassment.

Life Doesn't Frighten Me (25th Anniversary Edition)

Life Doesn't Frighten Me (25th Anniversary Edition) PDF Author: Maya Angelou
Publisher: Harry N. Abrams
ISBN: 9781419727481
Category : Juvenile Nonfiction
Languages : en
Pages : 0

Book Description
Shadows on the wallNoises down the hallLife doesn't frighten me at all Maya Angelou's brave, defiant poem celebrates the courage within each of us, young and old. From the scary thought of panthers in the park to the unsettling scene of a new classroom, fearsome images are summoned and dispelled by the power of faith in ourselves.Angelou's strong words are matched by the daring vision of artist Jean-Michel Basquiat, whose childlike style reveals the powerful emotions and fanciful imaginings of childhood. Together, Angelou's words and Basquiat's paintings create a place where every child, indeed every person, may experience his or her own fearlessness.Celebrating its successful 25 years in print, this brilliant introduction to poetry and contemporary art features brief, updated biographies of Angelou and Basquiat, an afterword from the editor, and a fresh new look. A selected bibliography of Angelou's books and a selected museum listing of Basquiat's works open the door to further inspiration through the fine arts.

The Angry Therapist

The Angry Therapist PDF Author: John Kim
Publisher: Parallax Press
ISBN: 1941529623
Category : Self-Help
Languages : en
Pages : 170

Book Description
Tackling relationships, career, and family issues, John Kim, LMFT, thinks of himself as a life-styledesigner, not a therapist. His radical new approach, that he sometimes calls “self-help in a shot glass” is easy, real, and to the point. He helps people make changes to their lives so that personal growth happens organically, just by living. Let’s face it, therapy is a luxury. Few of us have the time or money to devote to going to an office every week. With anecdotes illustrating principles in action (in relatable and sometimes irreverent fashion) and stand-alone practices and exercises, Kim gives readers the tools and directions to focus on what's right with them instead of what's wrong. When John Kim was going through the end of a relationship, he began blogging as The Angry Therapist, documenting his personal journey post-divorce. Traditional therapists avoid transparency, but Kim preferred the language of "me too" as opposed to "you should." He blogged about his own shortcomings, revelations, views on relationships, and the world. He spoke a different therapeutic language —open, raw, and at times subversive — and people responded. The Angry Therapist blog, that inspired this book, has been featured in The Atlantic Monthly and on NPR.