Breaking The Bonds Of Adult Child Abuse PDF Download

Author: Sister Renee Pittelli
Publisher: Outskirts Press
ISBN: 1478755539
Category : Religion
Languages : en
Pages : 646

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Book Description
BREAKING THE BONDS OF ADULT CHILD ABUSE: A BIBLICAL TEXTBOOK ON ABUSIVE NARCISSISTIC FAMILIES, HOW THEY OPERATE, AND HOW TO DEAL WITH THEM ADULT CHILD ABUSE *The Only Form of Abuse still tolerated, accepted and condoned in our society. *The Only Form of Abuse in which it is considered okay for a competent adult to be controlled, exploited, or damaged by someone else. *The Only Form of Abuse in which the victim is expected to continue suffering indefinitely, criticized for trying to protect herself, judged for escaping from her abuser, and openly discouraged from standing up for herself, talking about it, or revealing the abuse to others. Where do folks get the idea that Christians have to be meek and mild, silently enduring mistreatment, tolerating anything anybody else does, and timidly standing by while abusers trample all over them and other innocent victims? Since when is it a sin to take a stand and speak out against evil? This is what our abusers want us to believe, and it is nothing but misconceptions and lies. Do you know that God wants us to confront people who do evil? That he tells us to have nothing further to do with those who will not listen to rebuke? That there is no biblical requirement to forgive the unrepentant? In this book, you will learn about family abusers and their Silent Partners, why they abuse us and why we let them, setting and enforcing limits, godly confrontation, The Law of Sowing and Reaping and letting abusers suffer the Natural Consequences of their own behavior, how to tell if a comment is really a criticism, family jealousy and how to detect if a relative is jealous of you, recognizing and cutting ties with reprobates, improving your family holidays, how to forgive and what forgiveness really means, and what Jesus would REALLY do. Filled with helpful dialogue, this book offers many valuable lessons, including: *107 Examples of abusive behavior and betrayal *6 Major No-Nos for mature, independent adults *26 Reasons why they abuse us, and 55 questions to help us understand why we allow it *27 Ways to respond to a critic *35 Empowering Statements for declaring your boundaries and enforcing consequences *10 Simple Steps for learning to say no and 8 responses for those who aren%u2019t happy about it *40 Off-Limits Subjects *38 Signs of a meaningless apology and 17 signs of a meaningful one *The 21 Rules of No Contact *102 Questions to ask yourself when you%u2019re trying to decide if you should end a toxic relationship *5 Strategies for more pleasant holidays with your relatives *The 7 Biblical Duties of a proper parent *11 Steps for getting over a lost relationship Written with empathy, wisdom and understanding, and loaded with scriptural references, this book is an eye-opener that will help you claim your freedom and change your life.

Author: Sister Renee Pittelli
Publisher: Outskirts Press
ISBN: 1478755520
Category : Religion
Languages : en
Pages : 358

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PLEASING GOD WHILE PROTECTING YOURSELF Adult Children of narcissistic families often find themselves in predicaments that people with normal families never have to face. They spend a lifetime being stuck in no-win situations, forced to make uncomfortable choices, and then being made to live through the consequences with no support and no appreciation. Offering encouragement, comfort and wisdom, and filled with helpful suggestions, step-by-step guides, and just-right scripture verses, Narcissistic Predicaments is exactly what you need to help you set boundaries and free yourself in accordance with biblical principles. Including The 21 Rules of No Contact and 102 Questions to Ask Yourself When Deciding Whether to End an Abusive Relationship, here are the answers you’ve been looking for. When you try to set boundaries, have you been accused of not being a “good Christian,” because: *You are not honoring your father and mother? *You have to “forgive and forget,” even though your relatives refuse to stop their abuse? *You must forgive unrepentant evildoers because Jesus said “Father forgive them, for they know not what they do?” *You are taking revenge by enforcing consequences? *You have to “love your enemies?” In Narcissistic Predicaments, the author will help you let go of the guilt, learn effective strategies for protecting yourself, and find out what the Bible really says about dilemmas such as: *Should you let your estranged relatives have contact with your children? *Dealing with the family meddler who tries to intervene between you and your abuser *Working in the family business *What to expect when you upset the apple cart by getting married *What to do about holidays, weddings, and family celebrations *Does your abuser’s apology automatically cover those who took her side against you? *What to expect from estranged relatives who want to drag you back in *Reconciling on your terms, not theirs *If you leave, who will take care of your abusive parents in their old age? *Visiting a dying abuser *When your abuser or estranged relative dies- funerals, condolences, obituaries Just as a single narcissistic abuser refuses to allow others their autonomy apart from him, the narcissistic family does not see and accept its members as separate individuals. The uniqueness of each person and their differences are not celebrated. Instead, individuality and free-thinking are perceived as threatening and not allowed. Anyone who breaks from the group mentality will be shut up or shunned. There is one way of thinking, one opinion for all. If you offend one of them, you offend them all. If you set a boundary and say something to one, it’s as if you said it to the whole clan. If one is mad at you, they’re all mad at you. If one isn’t speaking to you, they’re all not speaking to you. And if one suddenly decides that they are speaking to you again, then everybody is speaking to you again. The only wild card they never consider is whether you will want to speak to them again. They simply assume that you will passively go along with whatever the group decides, just like all of them do. In the Bible, God instructs his children on how he wants them to relate to and live in peace with each other. He is not instructing the children of God on how to be loving and forgiving toward, live in peace with, and maintain relationships with the children of Satan. As Christians, we are to take up the full armor of God and fight the dark forces of evil, not peacefully co-exist with them. A breath of fresh air for Adult Children of abusive families, this compelling book will help you find the peace our heavenly Father promised you, His beloved child.

Author: Patrick Carnes
Publisher: Health Communications Incorporated
ISBN: 0757318231
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 338

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Book Description
Some really great books just keep getting better! For seventeen years The Betrayal Bond has been the primary source for therapists and patients wrestling the effects of emotional pain and harm caused by exploitation from someone they trusted. Divorce, litigation, incest and child abuse, domestic violence, kidnapping, professional exploitation and religious abuse are all areas of trauma bonding. These are situations and relationships of incredible intensity or importance lend themselves more easily to an exploitation of trust or power. In The Betrayal Bond, Dr. Carnes presents an in-depth study of these relationships; why they form, who is most susceptible, and how they become so powerful. Dr. Carnes also gives a clear explanation of the bond that compels people to tolerate the intolerable, and for the first time, maps out the brain connection that makes being with hurtful people comparable to 'a drug of choice.' Most importantly, Carnes provides practical steps to identify compulsive attachment patterns and ultimately to change or end them for good. This new edition includes: New science for understanding how our brains can make a prison of bad relationships New assessments and insights based on 50,000 research participants A new section utilizing the latest findings in attachment research and narrative therapy to concretely rewrite and rescript bad experiences A redefinition of the factors contributing to addictive relationships

Author: Amy J.L. Baker, PhD
Publisher: Rowman & Littlefield
ISBN: 1442236884
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 187

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Tens of thousands of children are removed from home each year due to some form of child maltreatment, usually physical neglect, physical abuse, or sexual abuse, although sometimes for emotional abuse as well. An additional significant number of children are victims of child maltreatment but remain in their home. Extensive research reveals the far reaching and long lasting negative impact of maltreatment on child victims, including on their physical, social, emotional, and behavioral functioning. One particularly troubling and complicated aspect is how the child victim forms (and maintains) a “traumatic bond” with his abuser, even becoming protective and defensive of that person despite the pain and suffering they have caused. This book will provide the reader with the essential experience of understanding how children make meaning of being maltreated by a parent, and how these traumatic bonds form and last. Through an examination of published memoirs of abuse, the authors analyze and reveal the commonalities in the stories to uncover the ways in which adult victims of childhood abuse understand and digest the traumatic experiences of their childhoods. This understanding can inform interventions and treatments designed for this vulnerable population and can help family and friends of victims understand more fully the maltreatment experience “from the inside out.”

Author: Jeffrey Bernstein
Publisher: Da Capo Lifelong Books
ISBN: 073821261X
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 274

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How to recognize and cope with Parent Frustration Syndrome (PFS): negative thoughts and feelings about your children"

Author: Sherrie Campbell
Publisher: New Harbinger Publications
ISBN: 1684039304
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 273

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Book Description
Cutting ties with a toxic family member is a crucial step away from a legacy of dysfunction and toward healing and happiness. This compassionate guide will help you embrace your decision with a sense of pride, validation, and faith in yourself; and provides powerful tools for creating boundaries, coping with judgment, and overcoming self-doubt. Do you have a toxic family member? Do you feel like cutting ties with this person—even as painful and scary as that may sound—would dramatically increase your well-being and improve your life? You’re not alone. Severing ties with a family member can be devastating; and cutting this toxic person out of your life may bring up feelings of guilt and uncertainty—especially if you feel judged by others regarding your decision. Fortunately, you can free yourself from this toxic family member in a healthy, responsible, and liberating way. In Adult Survivors of Toxic Family Members, psychologist and toxic-family survivor Sherrie Campbell offers effective strategies for setting strong boundaries after ending contact with a toxic family member, and provides powerful tools to help you heal from shame, self-doubt, and stigma. You’ll find the validation you need to embrace your decision with pride and acknowledgement of your self-worth. You’ll learn how to let go of negative thoughts and feelings. And finally, you’ll develop the skills needed to rediscover self-care, self-love, self-reliance, and healthy loving relationships. Whether you’re ready to sever ties with a toxic family member, or already have, this book will help guide you, every step of the way.

Author: Sister Renee Pittelli
Publisher: Outskirts Press
ISBN: 1478755547
Category : Religion
Languages : en
Pages : 424

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Book Description
Be Prepared For Your Next Encounter With The Bully In Your Family Or Church...In this long-awaited sequel to Narcissistic Predicaments, award-winning author Sister Renee Pittelli not only teaches more lessons on handling abusive birth-families, but expands the discussion to include abusive church families as well, with invaluable insights and information about phony “Christians” and toxic churches, the biblically in-error “Christian” abuser and the ignorant, rude and presumptuous Spiritual Bully. Narcissistic Confrontations is chock full of eye-opening revelations and helpful strategies, including: *The Narcissist’s 35 Rules of Engagement *12 Examples of juvenile behavior and mentality in narcissistic confrontations *All Narcissists Are Liars, and the things they lie about *Every interaction with a narcissist is a competition, and only the narcissist is allowed to win *The 3 Basic Principles of Selective Amnesia *3 Things that prove “I Can’t Help It” is a lie *What happens when you go to counseling with a narcissist *8 Ways to make a narcissist prove he’s really changed *The Business Deal with the hidden clauses *Making abuse sound like a good thing *How to spot and handle a child of Satan who is pretending to be a child of God *When they sense they’re losing their grip on you, 5 Surprising Tactics they use to keep you attached *37 Typical Steps in the decline and fall of our abusive relationships *How to handle the Silent Treatment, ultimatums, being “second fiddle,” getting disowned, and other narcissistic “punishments” *The Narcissistic Nuclear Meltdown *4 Secret Ways to “change” a narcissist *How to set a trap for the “spy” in your midst, and what to do with her once you figure out who she is *14 Promises to make to ourselves that will help us recognize toxic people and choose healthy relationships from now on *Luke 17:3 Ministries’ Abuser/Narcissist/Psychopath FAQ. In Narcissistic Confrontations you will learn about “normal” conversations with narcissists versus confrontations, why narcissists manipulate, how they use favors you do for them to ruin your reputation, narcissistic projection, narcissistic group dynamics, recognizing toxic people and groups, some clarification on what “lacking empathy” really means, how to tell if listening to someone else’s advice is a healthy or unhealthy pattern for you, what happens when narcissists team up with each other or with psychopaths, how to tell if it’s really “old age” or a “mental illness” that makes someone abuse you, the difference between “judging” and “rebuking,” Nonsense Statements and other abusive battle tactics, what happens in our relationships when we start changing, and much, much more. Narcissistic Confrontations prepares you for battle with family and church narcissists, so that you will no longer be caught off-guard, blindsided and manipulated by the wiles of the evil among us. Written with humor, compassion and wisdom, and filled with empowering scriptural references, this book provides loads of effective strategies and useful step-by-step directions, as well as support, validation, peace and freedom for those who find themselves targeted by ungodly birth-families and church families.

Author: Karyl McBride
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1416551328
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 275

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The first book specifically for daughters suffering from the emotional abuse of selfish, self-involved mothers,Will I Ever Be Good Enough?provides the expert assistance you need in order to overcome this debilitating history and reclaim your life for yourself. Drawing on over two decades of experience as a therapist specializing in women's psychology and health, psychotherapist Dr. Karyl McBride helpsyou recognize the widespread effects of this maternal emotional abuse and guides you as you create an individualized program for self-protection, resolution, and complete recovery.An estimated 1.5 million American women have narcissistic personality disorder, which makes them so insecure and overbearing, insensitive and domineering that they can psychologically damage their daughters for life. Daughters of narcissistic mothers learn that maternal love is not unconditional, and that it is given only when they behave in accordance with their mothers' often unreasonable expectations and whims. As adults, these daughters consequently have difficulty overcoming their insecurities and feelings of inadequacy, disappointment, sadness, and emotional emptiness. They may also have a terrible fear of abandonment that leads them to form unhealthy love relationships, as well as a tendency to perfectionism and unrelenting self-criticism, or to self-sabotage and frustration.Herself the recovering daughter of a narcissistic mother, Dr. McBride includes her personal struggle, which adds a profound level of authority to her work, along with the perspectives of the hundreds of suffering daughters she's interviewed over the years. Their stories of how maternal abuse has manifested in their lives -- as well as how they have successfully overcome its effects -- show you that you're not alone and that you can take back your life and have the controlyouwant.Dr. McBride's step-by-step program will enable you to:(1) Recognize your own experience with maternal narcissism and its effects on all aspects of your life (2) Discover how you have internalized verbal and nonverbal messages from your mother and how these have translated into a strong desire to overachieve or a tendency to self-sabotage (3) Construct a step-by-step program to reclaim your life and enhance your sense of self, a process that includes creating a psychological separation from your mother and breaking the legacy of abuse. You will also learn how not to repeat your mother's mistakes with your own daughter.Warm and sympathetic, filled with the examples of women who have established healthy boundaries with their hurtful mothers,Will I Ever Be Good Enough?encourages and inspires you as it aids your recovery.

Author: Christopher Bagley
Publisher: Universal-Publishers
ISBN: 1581125615
Category : Psychology
Languages : en
Pages : 211

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This book is about men and women who neglect and abuse children, physically, emotionally and sexually. A number of key themes emerge: Emotional abuse causes the most long-term harm to children, although combinations of emotional with physical and/or sexual abuse cause the most harm to long-term mental health. Because of the long-term burden which abuse imposes on its victims, it is crucial to intervene effectively with abusers (potential and actual) to prevent them from either beginning abuse, committing further abuse, or entering the victim-to-abuser cycle. Abusers have often experienced physical, emotional or sexual abuse or neglect in their own childhoods. The role of disordered attachments to adult figures in the victim-to-abuser cycle is considered in detail, including ways of effective intervention. Men and women who kill children can be characterized in various ways, and various programmes of intervention can be designed. The cycle of poverty is also considered in detail, a process by which economically poor families beget children who enter a cycle of both economic and psychological poverty, in which risks of all kinds of child abuse and neglect are elevated.

Author: Michael Wyness
Publisher: Routledge
ISBN: 1135709181
Category : Education
Languages : en
Pages : 174

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Drawing on work from within the developing field of childhood studies, this text examines theoretical and policy driven understandings of the current position of children in society. Through an analysis of policy reforms and professional initiatives within educational child care and legal contexts, the author examines different, potentially competing viewpoints of childrens social position. Chapters are devoted to a number of related themes, including child policy and moral ambiguity, the limits to child protection, the individualization of schooling and childhood and citizenship.