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Why Cats are Assholes

Why Cats are Assholes PDF Author: Liz Miele
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 151075623X
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 192

Book Description
Most people love cats. They’re fluffy, playful, and can be a joy to have as a companion. However, they can also be huge assholes. So what can you do? How do you deal with a roommate who always seems to be plotting to kill you? While we all love sharing adorable photos of kittens, these frisky felines are known more for marching to the beat of their own drum than abiding by the rules. From running around your home at two in the morning, knocking everything off your shelves, or taking up most of your bed, these furry critters can be immensely selfish and disrespectful to those who give them endless love and affection. Why Cats Are Assholes is up for such a challenge. From studying their history all the way back to ancient Egypt, comedian Liz Miele—the daughter of veterinarians—digests the cat psyche to try and understand why they do the things they do, and how we, as their loyal servants, can handle domestic bliss with them around. With the help of her cat Pasta, Miele breaks down the common behaviors of cats in an attempt to try and better understand their plan of attack (if there is one), as well as what we can do to better prepare ourselves. Whether you have one, two, or twelve fur babies, Why Cats Are Assholes is the ultimate guide to better understanding your pet’s behavior while taking back your home from these domesticated terrorists.

Why Cats are Assholes

Why Cats are Assholes PDF Author: Liz Miele
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 151075623X
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 192

Book Description
Most people love cats. They’re fluffy, playful, and can be a joy to have as a companion. However, they can also be huge assholes. So what can you do? How do you deal with a roommate who always seems to be plotting to kill you? While we all love sharing adorable photos of kittens, these frisky felines are known more for marching to the beat of their own drum than abiding by the rules. From running around your home at two in the morning, knocking everything off your shelves, or taking up most of your bed, these furry critters can be immensely selfish and disrespectful to those who give them endless love and affection. Why Cats Are Assholes is up for such a challenge. From studying their history all the way back to ancient Egypt, comedian Liz Miele—the daughter of veterinarians—digests the cat psyche to try and understand why they do the things they do, and how we, as their loyal servants, can handle domestic bliss with them around. With the help of her cat Pasta, Miele breaks down the common behaviors of cats in an attempt to try and better understand their plan of attack (if there is one), as well as what we can do to better prepare ourselves. Whether you have one, two, or twelve fur babies, Why Cats Are Assholes is the ultimate guide to better understanding your pet’s behavior while taking back your home from these domesticated terrorists.

Does This Collar Make My Butt Look Big?

Does This Collar Make My Butt Look Big? PDF Author: Dena Harris
Publisher:
ISBN: 1607744899
Category : Cats
Languages : en
Pages : 130

Book Description
This diet-guide parody shows "extra furry" cats how to get svelte with kitty-specific versions of popular weight-loss and fitness regimes like the Zone, South Beach, Mayo Clinic, and French Women Don't Get Fat (But Their Cats Do). Americans own more than 86 million cats, and the wild popularity of cat videos--from YouTube to the Internet Cat Video Film Festival--proves that cat-lovers can't get enough kitty humor. This book pokes fun at tubby tabbies--the world's cutest (and surliest) fat creatures--with laugh-out-loud details that will tickle the funnybone of anyone "owned" by a cat. Lampooning trendy weight-loss regimes and health gurus, this book will also make people feel better about their own battle of the bulge in comparison to cats' insatiable appetites and lazy lifestyles. By eating right for their blood type, sourcing raw and living foods, joining Weight Stalkers, avoiding toxic treats, and exercising while lying down, felines of every shape (round) and size (round) will soon be motivated to ditch the fifth serving of Beef Morsels in Gravy for fresh, local options like that vole in the backyard.

My Cat Is an Asshole

My Cat Is an Asshole PDF Author: Hank Whitefoot
Publisher: Createspace Independent Publishing Platform
ISBN: 9781532827822
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 34

Book Description
Like any normal cat, Tobey wants love, affection and attention. Sometimes he shows this very well, other times he is an ass hole. Follow us on his journey as he shows his love and annoyance. You will discover how Tobey rubs his nasty lips on everything in sight, performs the one-leg salute and bugs the hell out of me.

Lazy-Ass Cats

Lazy-Ass Cats PDF Author: Lindsay Conner
Publisher: Mascot Books
ISBN: 9781684010448
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 0

Book Description
Trouble in Purradise? Having a catastrophic day? Unwind with the Lazy-Ass Cats Coloring Book. Whip out your colored pencilsforty clever coloring pages are ready for your artistic touch. Haven't tried coloring? You have got to be kitten me. A hilarious gift for coloring enthusiasts, cat lovers, and even people who don't know they like to color yet, the book features single-sided pages on crisp, quality paper.

Prince Of Cats

Prince Of Cats PDF Author: Ronald Wimberly
Publisher: Image Comics
ISBN: 1534301437
Category : Comics & Graphic Novels
Languages : en
Pages : 154

Book Description
PRINCE OF CATS is the B side to Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet, played at an eighties block party in an NY where underground sword dueling blossomed alongside hip-hop, punk, disco, and no wave. Itês the story of the minor players with Tybalt at the center. The definitive printing of RONALD WIMBERLY's critically-acclaimed first work, presented as intended for the first time.

Metal Cats

Metal Cats PDF Author: Alexandra Crockett
Publisher: powerHouse Books
ISBN: 1576877299
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 140

Book Description
Skulls and Siamese. Corpse paint and Persians. Baphomet, pentagrams, blood, and tabbies! Metal Cats combines two amazing subjects: the extreme personalities of the hardcore metal music scene and their adorable kitties. These incredibly cute and fluffy felines have been photographed with their loving owners in and around the dark abodes of musicians, fans, and promoters of metal including members of the bands Black Goat, Thrones, Isis, Lightning Swords of Death, Book of Black Earth, Skarp, Harassor, Akimbo, Aldebaran, Atriarch, Oak, Ghoul, Ludicra, Holy Grail, Xasthur, Cattle Decapitation, Murder Construct, Exhumed, Morbid Angel, Municipal Waste, Skeletonwitch, Gypsyhawk, Nausea, Phobia, and Napalm Death. Metal isn't all dark and disturbing, violent and misanthropic. Metal Cats is proof that while the music may be brutal, the people in the scene are softies for their pets just like you and me... A portion of the proceeds from this book and a series of benefit shows held along the West Coast will go towards one no-kill shelter in each of the four main cities visited.

Cat Daddy

Cat Daddy PDF Author: Jackson Galaxy
Publisher: TarcherPerigee
ISBN: 0399163808
Category : Biography & Autobiography
Languages : en
Pages : 322

Book Description
Cat behaviorist and star of Animal Planet's hit television show "My Cat from Hell," Galaxy, a.k.a. "Cat Daddy," isn't what readers might expect for a cat expert. Yet his ability to connect with even the most troubled felines--not to mention their owners--is awe-inspiring.

The Other End of the Leash

The Other End of the Leash PDF Author: Patricia McConnell, Ph.D.
Publisher: Ballantine Books
ISBN: 0307489183
Category : Pets
Languages : en
Pages : 289

Book Description
Learn to communicate with your dog—using their language “Good reading for dog lovers and an immensely useful manual for dog owners.”—The Washington Post An Applied Animal Behaviorist and dog trainer with more than twenty years’ experience, Dr. Patricia McConnell reveals a revolutionary new perspective on our relationship with dogs—sharing insights on how “man’s best friend” might interpret our behavior, as well as essential advice on how to interact with our four-legged friends in ways that bring out the best in them. After all, humans and dogs are two entirely different species, each shaped by its individual evolutionary heritage. Quite simply, humans are primates and dogs are canids (as are wolves, coyotes, and foxes). Since we each speak a different native tongue, a lot gets lost in the translation. This marvelous guide demonstrates how even the slightest changes in our voices and in the ways we stand can help dogs understand what we want. Inside you will discover: • How you can get your dog to come when called by acting less like a primate and more like a dog • Why the advice to “get dominance” over your dog can cause problems • Why “rough and tumble primate play” can lead to trouble—and how to play with your dog in ways that are fun and keep him out of mischief • How dogs and humans share personality types—and why most dogs want to live with benevolent leaders rather than “alpha wanna-bes!” Fascinating, insightful, and compelling, The Other End of the Leash is a book that strives to help you connect with your dog in a completely new way—so as to enrich that most rewarding of relationships.

I Could Pee on This

I Could Pee on This PDF Author: Francesco Marciuliano
Publisher: Chronicle Books
ISBN: 1452121869
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 111

Book Description
Animal lovers will laugh out loud at the quirkiness of their feline friends with these insightful and curious poems from the singular minds of funny cats. In this hilarious, bestselling book of tongue-in-cheek poetry. The author of the internationally syndicated comic strip Sally Forth helps cats unlock their creative potential and explain their odd behavior to ignorant humans. With titles like "Who Is That on Your Lap?," "This Is My Chair," "Kneel Before Me," "Nudge," and "Some of My Best Friends Are Dogs," the poems collected in I Could Pee on This perfectly capture the inner workings of the cat psyche. With photos of the cat "authors" throughout, this whimsical animal book reveals kitties at their wackiest, and most exasperating (but always lovable). Ideal for that "crazy cat lady" or "cat mom/dad" in your life this collection of poems makes for the perfect cat-themed gift for anyone who's obsessed with our feline friends.

Assholes Need Love Too

Assholes Need Love Too PDF Author: S. J. Russell
Publisher:
ISBN: 9780996299428
Category :
Languages : en
Pages :

Book Description
Whether you've ever known an asshole, maybe you are an asshole, or maybe you don't know you're an asshole, this book has a little something for everyone. None of the assholes featured in this book are fictional. They all hail unapologetically from New Jersey, and live in a beautiful place with absolutely nothing to complain about. They just happen to be a pig, a rooster and a dog.