Very British Wit

Very British Wit PDF Author: Richard Benson
Publisher: Summersdale
ISBN: 1783726806
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 191

Book Description
With quips, quotes and insults from classic favourites William Shakespeare and Jane Austen to modern humorists Stephen Fry and Billy Connolly, this delightful book will ensure you’re never at a loss for the perfect witticism.

Great British Wit

Great British Wit PDF Author: Rosemarie Jarski
Publisher: Random House
ISBN: 0091906318
Category : English wit and humor
Languages : en
Pages : 466

Book Description
Arranged thematically--from Class and Character, Sex and Snobbery, to the Foreigner's Eye View--here is the definitive collection of the British nation's funniest quotations. Among the many great and good who dazzle us with their wit are Martin Amis, Jane Austen, Billy Connolly, Quentin Crisp, Roald Dahl, John Lennon, Queen Victoria, and Oscar Wilde.

Very British Problems

Very British Problems PDF Author: Rob Temple
Publisher: Sphere
ISBN: 0751556076
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 288

Book Description
There's an epidemic sweeping the nation Symptoms include: *Acute embarrassment at the mere notion of 'making a fuss' *Extreme awkwardness when faced with any social greeting beyond a brisk handshake *An unhealthy preoccupation with meteorology Doctors have also reported several cases of unnecessary apologising, an obsessive interest in correct queuing etiquette and dramatic sighing in the presence of loud teenagers on public transport. If you have experienced any of these symptoms, you may be suffering from VERY BRITISH PROBLEMS. VERY BRITISH PROBLEMS are highly contagious. There is no known cure. Rob Temple's hilarious new book reveals all the ways in which we are a nation of socially awkward but well-meaning oddballs, struggling to make it through every day without apologising to an inanimate object. Take comfort in misfortunes of others. You are not alone.

The Mammoth Book of Great British Humour

The Mammoth Book of Great British Humour PDF Author: Michael Powell
Publisher: Hachette UK
ISBN: 1849016690
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 490

Book Description
A doorstopper of a collection of the very best of both contemporary and classic British wit and humour. From Monty Python's 'Nudge, nudge, wink, wink, say no more . . .' to Dan Antopolski's 'Hedgehogs. Why can't they just share the hedge?'. From George Bernard Shaw to Michael McIntyre, from Eric Morecombe to Omid Djalili, and from Oscar Wilde to Jimmy Carr, a side-splitting look at Britain, the British and life in general. Including these gems from Britain's finest comedians: I was delighted to learn that my friend's schadenfreude was not as satisfying as mine. Armando Iannucci. I went on a girls' night out recently. The invitation said 'dress to kill'. I went as Rose West. Zoe Lyons For a while I was the perfect mother. Then the Pethidine wore off. Jenny Eclair. My girlfriend was complaining last night that I never listen to her. Or something like that. Jack Dee. Why do dogs always race to the door when the doorbell rings because it's hardly ever for them? Harry Hill. Arse-gravy of the very worst kind. Stephen Fry on The Da Vinci Code. You have to come up with this shit every year. Last week I just wrote "I still love you, see last year's card for full details." Michael McIntyre on Valentines Day. I went to the doctor and he said, 'You've got hypochondria.' I said, 'Not that as well!'Tim Vine. I have the body of an eighteen year old. I keep it in the fridge. Spike Milligan. When someone close to you dies, move seats. Peter Kay. My neighbour asked if he could use my lawnmower and I told him of course he could, so long as he didn't take it out of my garden. Eric Morecambe. My dad's dying wish was to have his family around him. I can't help thinking he would have been better off with more oxygen. Jimmy Carr. Eighty-two point six per cent of statistics are made up on the spot. Vic Reeves. A bird in the hand invariably shits on your wrist. Billy Connolly. Getting divorced isn't like a bereavement at all, because if he's died, I'd have had me mortgage paid, and I could've danced on his grave. Sarah Millican. My greatest hero is Nelson Mandela: incarcerated for 25 years, he was released in 1990, he's been out about 18 years now and he hasn't re-offended. Ricky Gervais. If you want to confuse a girl, buy her a pair of chocolate shoes. Milton Jones. Phil Collins is losing his hearing, making him the luckiest man at a Phil Collins Concert. Simon Amstell. We'll continue our investigation into the political beliefs of nudists. We've already noticed a definite swing to the left. Ronnie Barker. A guy walks into the psychiatrist wearing only Clingfilm for shorts. The psychiatrist says, "Well, I can clearly see your nuts. Tommy Cooper

Elements of Wit

Elements of Wit PDF Author: Benjamin Errett
Publisher: Penguin
ISBN: 0698153863
Category : Social Science
Languages : en
Pages : 258

Book Description
Got wit? We’ve all been in that situation where we need to say something clever, but innocuous; smart enough to show some intelligence, without showing off; something funny, but not a joke. What we need in that moment is wit—that sparkling combination of charm, humor, confidence, and most of all, the right words at the right time. Elements of Wit is an engaging book that brings together the greatest wits of our time, and previous ones from Oscar Wilde to Nora Ephron, Winston Churchill to Christopher Hitchens, Mae West to Louis CK, and many in between. With chapters covering the essential ingredients of wit, this primer sheds light on how anyone—introverts, extroverts, wallflowers, and bon vivants—can find the right zinger, quip, parry, or retort…or at least be a little bit more interesting.

Very British Problems: the Most Awkward One Yet

Very British Problems: the Most Awkward One Yet PDF Author: Rob Temple
Publisher: Sphere
ISBN: 9780751574715
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 272

Book Description
Have you ever . . . *Watched in horror as someone helps themselves to the last roast potato? *Broken out in hives at the suggestion that you 'Introduce yourself...' over Zoom? *Been extra dramatic while rubbing in the shop's hand sanitiser, so everyone knows how thoroughly decent you are? . . . then you may be suffering from VERY BRITISH PROBLEMS Very British Problems are sweeping the nation like never before. They are in our homes, in our Zoom calls, in the queue for the supermarket, in our schools, cafés, parks, rivers, cities, towns, villages, glove boxes, sock drawers . . Basically, they're inescapable. There is no vaccine. There is no cure. So there we have it, we're stuck with the malady of Britishness for the foreseeable. Nightmare, isn't it? Ah, well. Could be worse. Not quite sure how, though, off the top of my head. Any thoughts? PRAISE for VERY BRITISH PROBLEMS 'Hilarious' Daily Express 'Temple pays affectionate and comic homage to the sheer quirkiness of being British' Good Book Guide 'A corking Christmas stocking filler' Weekend Sport 'Had us guffawing into our Earl Grey tea' Bella

Sorry, I'm British!

Sorry, I'm British! PDF Author: Ben Crystal
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1780740409
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 228

Book Description
An original and funny take on what it is to be British The A to Z guide to your own laughable behaviour Explore the oddities of the British psyche with this informative and witty illustrated guide. From small-talk to superiority, from cricket to condiments, and curry to class, when wandering lonely through the clouds of British behaviour this is the perfect companion. Discover the fate of a pitbull named ASBO, find out why we get bank holidays when we do, and learn why it's better to drive on the left. With 40 hilarious illustrations from acclaimed cartoonist Ed McLachlan, this is the perfect book for a nation that loves to laugh at itself.

Wit's End: What Wit Is, How It Works, and Why We Need It

Wit's End: What Wit Is, How It Works, and Why We Need It PDF Author: James Geary
Publisher: W. W. Norton & Company
ISBN: 039325495X
Category : Language Arts & Disciplines
Languages : en
Pages : 202

Book Description
Entertaining, illuminating, and entirely unique, Wit’s End “convey[s] the power of wit to refresh the mind” (Henry Hitchings, Wall Street Journal). In “this inventive and playful book” (Tom Beer, Newsday), James Geary explores every facet of wittiness, from its role in innovation to why puns are the highest form of wit. Adopting a different style for each chapter—from dramatic dialogue to sermon, heroic couplets to a barroom monologue—Geary embodies wit in all its forms. Wit’s End agilely balances psychology, folktale, visual art, and literary history with lighthearted humor and acute insight, demonstrating that wit and wisdom are really the same thing.

The Wit and Wisdom of Boris Johnson

The Wit and Wisdom of Boris Johnson PDF Author: Harry Mount
Publisher: Bloomsbury Publishing
ISBN: 1472976525
Category : Biography & Autobiography
Languages : en
Pages : 209

Book Description
A return to the wit and wisdom of Boris Johnson – Brexiteer, Foreign Secretary, Prime Minister. New and updated edition. 2019 – the year that Boris took on the 'lingering gloomadon-poppers', pledged to steer the UK between the 'Scylla and Charybdis of Corbyn and Farage' and into the calmer waters of political freedom. Of course there was always bound to be 'a bit of plaster coming off the ceilings of Europe's Chanceries'. Harry Mount has updated his edited collection of the Prime Minister's wit and wisdom with three new chapters dealing with Boris's time as Brexiteer-in-chief; Foreign Secretary and 'On the Threshold of Downing Street'. He describes Boris's Brexit campaign, his leadership breakdown in 2016, his ups and downs as Foreign Secretary, his time outside the political establishment, his turbulent private life and how Boris felt it was his manifest destiny to become the prime minister. So buckle up for a riotous tour of the million-pound NHS funder, golden wonder, pro-having, pro-eating blond behemoth. This is The Wit and Wisdom of Boris Johnson.

Very British Problems Volume III

Very British Problems Volume III PDF Author: Rob Temple
Publisher: Hachette UK
ISBN: 0751570109
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 263

Book Description
Have you ever... Got into a four-hour argument over what does and does not belong in a full English breakfast? Sat perfectly still in terrified silence until the unknown number stops ringing and goes away? Replied to the question 'Can I get you anything? Tea, coffee, water?' with 'Lovely, thanks'? ...then you may (still) be suffering from VERY BRITISH PROBLEMS. Rob Temple is back to guide you through the maze of idiosyncrasies, loveable foibles and - let's admit - outright eccentricities that define this sceptred isle. Featuring groundbreaking original research from his @soverybritish Twitter account (spoiler: 84% of Brits prefer milk in first), this book may not be a remedy for your incurable VBPs, but it will certainly provide amusement as you hide in the loo from an unexpected visitor.