Author: Seth Kinstle
Publisher: Seth Kinstle
ISBN:
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 33
Book Description
A few short stories that include parodies of classic Christmas characters. Maybe they can find their way among the ranks of stories that fuel the Christmas spirit. Other than that they're just some crap a crazy guy wrote. Have fun and make sure to reimagine Christmas every year to keep it fresh. Unless you're old and you don't care. Chances are no one will ever care about these stories anyways. That's not being negative that's just reality. Alternatively my optimism has a point that at least I laughed at these stories. I had a good time destroying Christmas by elevating these stories to be fit for a mature audience. Who knows maybe you'll end up telling them at the bar or on Christmas morning to have a laugh. Either way I feel like they're just a funny dumpster fire.
Tales of Christmas Comedy
Author: Seth Kinstle
Publisher: Seth Kinstle
ISBN:
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 33
Book Description
A few short stories that include parodies of classic Christmas characters. Maybe they can find their way among the ranks of stories that fuel the Christmas spirit. Other than that they're just some crap a crazy guy wrote. Have fun and make sure to reimagine Christmas every year to keep it fresh. Unless you're old and you don't care. Chances are no one will ever care about these stories anyways. That's not being negative that's just reality. Alternatively my optimism has a point that at least I laughed at these stories. I had a good time destroying Christmas by elevating these stories to be fit for a mature audience. Who knows maybe you'll end up telling them at the bar or on Christmas morning to have a laugh. Either way I feel like they're just a funny dumpster fire.
Publisher: Seth Kinstle
ISBN:
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 33
Book Description
A few short stories that include parodies of classic Christmas characters. Maybe they can find their way among the ranks of stories that fuel the Christmas spirit. Other than that they're just some crap a crazy guy wrote. Have fun and make sure to reimagine Christmas every year to keep it fresh. Unless you're old and you don't care. Chances are no one will ever care about these stories anyways. That's not being negative that's just reality. Alternatively my optimism has a point that at least I laughed at these stories. I had a good time destroying Christmas by elevating these stories to be fit for a mature audience. Who knows maybe you'll end up telling them at the bar or on Christmas morning to have a laugh. Either way I feel like they're just a funny dumpster fire.
A Christmas Story
Author: Jean Shepherd
Publisher: Crown
ISBN: 0307768732
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 109
Book Description
A beloved, bestselling classic of humorous and nostalgic Americana—the book that inspired the equally classic Yuletide film and the live musical on Fox. The holiday film A Christmas Story, first released in 1983, has become a bona fide Christmas perennial, gaining in stature and fame with each succeeding year. Its affectionate, wacky, and wryly realistic portrayal of an American family’s typical Christmas joys and travails in small-town Depression-era Indiana has entered our imagination and our hearts with a force equal to It’s a Wonderful Life and Miracle on 34th Street. This edition of A Christmas Story gathers together in one hilarious volume the gems of autobiographical humor that Jean Shepherd drew upon to create this enduring film. Here is young Ralphie Parker’s shocking discovery that his decoder ring is really a device to promote Ovaltine; his mother and father’s pitched battle over the fate of a lascivious leg lamp; the unleashed and unnerving savagery of Ralphie’s duel in the show with the odious bullies Scut Farkas and Grover Dill; and, most crucially, Ralphie’s unstoppable campaign to get Santa—or anyone else—to give him a Red Ryder carbine action 200-shot range model air rifle. Who cares that the whole adult world is telling him, “You’ll shoot your eye out, kid”? The pieces that comprise A Christmas Story, previously published in the larger collections In God We Trust, All Others Pay Cash and Wanda Hickey’s Night of Golden Memories, coalesce in a magical fashion to become an irresistible piece of Americana, quite the equal of the film in its ability to warm the heart and tickle the funny bone.
Publisher: Crown
ISBN: 0307768732
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 109
Book Description
A beloved, bestselling classic of humorous and nostalgic Americana—the book that inspired the equally classic Yuletide film and the live musical on Fox. The holiday film A Christmas Story, first released in 1983, has become a bona fide Christmas perennial, gaining in stature and fame with each succeeding year. Its affectionate, wacky, and wryly realistic portrayal of an American family’s typical Christmas joys and travails in small-town Depression-era Indiana has entered our imagination and our hearts with a force equal to It’s a Wonderful Life and Miracle on 34th Street. This edition of A Christmas Story gathers together in one hilarious volume the gems of autobiographical humor that Jean Shepherd drew upon to create this enduring film. Here is young Ralphie Parker’s shocking discovery that his decoder ring is really a device to promote Ovaltine; his mother and father’s pitched battle over the fate of a lascivious leg lamp; the unleashed and unnerving savagery of Ralphie’s duel in the show with the odious bullies Scut Farkas and Grover Dill; and, most crucially, Ralphie’s unstoppable campaign to get Santa—or anyone else—to give him a Red Ryder carbine action 200-shot range model air rifle. Who cares that the whole adult world is telling him, “You’ll shoot your eye out, kid”? The pieces that comprise A Christmas Story, previously published in the larger collections In God We Trust, All Others Pay Cash and Wanda Hickey’s Night of Golden Memories, coalesce in a magical fashion to become an irresistible piece of Americana, quite the equal of the film in its ability to warm the heart and tickle the funny bone.
How to Trick a Christmas Elf
Author: Sue Fliess
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1510744320
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 34
Book Description
To find out whether Santa thinks you’re naughty or nice, you’ll need to trick an elf into letting you see the list! Legend has it that the only way to find out if you’re on Santa’s naughty or nice list is to trick an elf into letting you sneak a peek! But be careful: elves are tricky themselves! To get a look at the list, you’ll need to be clever in crafting a distracting craft to catch the elf’s attention. So, grab some Christmas supplies like ribbons, twinkle lights, bows, and candy canes, and get prepared for your sly holiday visitor! On the nights leading up to Christmas, one of Santa’s elves will show up to keep watch on kids and to report on their naughty or nice behavior! However, if you’re careful and clever and quick, you can set up a beautiful little sleigh that will distract your elf, and then you’ll be sure to get a glimpse at Santa’s list! Sue Fliess’s poetic read-aloud text and Simona Sanfilippo’s vibrant, whimsical illustrations will provide much fun for young readers eager to trick their own Christmas elf and find which list they’re on! Also included are guides for teachers and parents about how to engage children in building an elf sleigh themselves and how to interest them in the history of the holiday and the many cultures that celebrate Santa’s tiny helpers.
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1510744320
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 34
Book Description
To find out whether Santa thinks you’re naughty or nice, you’ll need to trick an elf into letting you see the list! Legend has it that the only way to find out if you’re on Santa’s naughty or nice list is to trick an elf into letting you sneak a peek! But be careful: elves are tricky themselves! To get a look at the list, you’ll need to be clever in crafting a distracting craft to catch the elf’s attention. So, grab some Christmas supplies like ribbons, twinkle lights, bows, and candy canes, and get prepared for your sly holiday visitor! On the nights leading up to Christmas, one of Santa’s elves will show up to keep watch on kids and to report on their naughty or nice behavior! However, if you’re careful and clever and quick, you can set up a beautiful little sleigh that will distract your elf, and then you’ll be sure to get a glimpse at Santa’s list! Sue Fliess’s poetic read-aloud text and Simona Sanfilippo’s vibrant, whimsical illustrations will provide much fun for young readers eager to trick their own Christmas elf and find which list they’re on! Also included are guides for teachers and parents about how to engage children in building an elf sleigh themselves and how to interest them in the history of the holiday and the many cultures that celebrate Santa’s tiny helpers.
Click, Clack, Ho! Ho! Ho!
Author: Doreen Cronin
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1442496738
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 40
Book Description
Santa comes to the barnyard in this holiday addition to the award-winning Click, Clack series from the New York Times bestselling Doreen Cronin
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1442496738
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 40
Book Description
Santa comes to the barnyard in this holiday addition to the award-winning Click, Clack series from the New York Times bestselling Doreen Cronin
Fritz the Farting Reindeer Saves Christmas
Author: Humor Heals Us
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781953399144
Category : Juvenile Nonfiction
Languages : en
Pages : 36
Book Description
Fritz doesn't know it, but he's a big part of saving Christmas this year. Rudolph's red nose has stopped shining. Now, Santa has no light to guide him. How will he find his way to the children's homes? A children's beloved classic, this story will have kids rolling on the floor with laughter. Adults are permitted to laugh too. Perfect for Thanksgiving, Christmas, or anytime of the year! Vote on new title names and receive freebies at humorhealsus.com
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781953399144
Category : Juvenile Nonfiction
Languages : en
Pages : 36
Book Description
Fritz doesn't know it, but he's a big part of saving Christmas this year. Rudolph's red nose has stopped shining. Now, Santa has no light to guide him. How will he find his way to the children's homes? A children's beloved classic, this story will have kids rolling on the floor with laughter. Adults are permitted to laugh too. Perfect for Thanksgiving, Christmas, or anytime of the year! Vote on new title names and receive freebies at humorhealsus.com
Nothing Lasts Forever (Basis for the film Die Hard)
Author: Roderick Thorp
Publisher: Graymalkin Media
ISBN: 193516984X
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 172
Book Description
High atop a Los Angeles skyscraper, an office Christmas party turns into a deadly cage-match between a lone New York City cop and a gang of international terrorists. Every action fan knows it could only be the explosive big-screen blockbuster Die Hard. But before Bruce Willis blew away audiences as unstoppable hero John McClane, author Roderick Thorp knocked out thriller readers with the bestseller that started it all. A dozen heavily armed terrorists have taken hostages, issued demands, and promised bloodshed — all according to plan. But they haven’t counted on a death-defying, one-man cavalry with no shoes, no backup, and no intention of going down easily. As hot-headed cops swarm outside, and cold-blooded killers wield machine guns and rocket launchers inside, the stage is set for the ultimate showdown between anti-hero and uber-villains. Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good fight... to the death. Ho ho ho!
Publisher: Graymalkin Media
ISBN: 193516984X
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 172
Book Description
High atop a Los Angeles skyscraper, an office Christmas party turns into a deadly cage-match between a lone New York City cop and a gang of international terrorists. Every action fan knows it could only be the explosive big-screen blockbuster Die Hard. But before Bruce Willis blew away audiences as unstoppable hero John McClane, author Roderick Thorp knocked out thriller readers with the bestseller that started it all. A dozen heavily armed terrorists have taken hostages, issued demands, and promised bloodshed — all according to plan. But they haven’t counted on a death-defying, one-man cavalry with no shoes, no backup, and no intention of going down easily. As hot-headed cops swarm outside, and cold-blooded killers wield machine guns and rocket launchers inside, the stage is set for the ultimate showdown between anti-hero and uber-villains. Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good fight... to the death. Ho ho ho!
Only You Can Save Christmas!
Author: Adam Wallace
Publisher: Sourcebooks Jabberwocky
ISBN: 9781492641360
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 40
Book Description
Wink the Elf asks the reader's help to get Santa's present ready for Mrs. Claus on Christmas Eve.
Publisher: Sourcebooks Jabberwocky
ISBN: 9781492641360
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 40
Book Description
Wink the Elf asks the reader's help to get Santa's present ready for Mrs. Claus on Christmas Eve.
Don't Shake the Present!
Author: Bill Cotter
Publisher: Sourcebooks, Inc.
ISBN: 1728216141
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 24
Book Description
Go on a festive and fun-filled adventure with Larry in the hilarious Christmas novelty edition of the USA Today bestselling series, Don't Push the Button! 'Tis the season for gift-giving and kids will adore this new addition to the creative and interactive series that has touched the lives of over half-a-million readers. Don't Shake the Present! is the perfect stocking stuffer, holiday gift for kids, and present for 1 year old girls and boys celebrating their first Christmas ever! Kids and parents alike will return to this wacky holiday book time and again. Larry the lovable monster has received a present, and he's desperate to know what's inside. He needs your help to figure it out. But whatever you do... DON'T SHAKE THE PRESENT! Hi, I'm Larry. This is my present. I REALLY want to open it, but I'm not allowed.
Publisher: Sourcebooks, Inc.
ISBN: 1728216141
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 24
Book Description
Go on a festive and fun-filled adventure with Larry in the hilarious Christmas novelty edition of the USA Today bestselling series, Don't Push the Button! 'Tis the season for gift-giving and kids will adore this new addition to the creative and interactive series that has touched the lives of over half-a-million readers. Don't Shake the Present! is the perfect stocking stuffer, holiday gift for kids, and present for 1 year old girls and boys celebrating their first Christmas ever! Kids and parents alike will return to this wacky holiday book time and again. Larry the lovable monster has received a present, and he's desperate to know what's inside. He needs your help to figure it out. But whatever you do... DON'T SHAKE THE PRESENT! Hi, I'm Larry. This is my present. I REALLY want to open it, but I'm not allowed.
Mr. Willowby's Christmas Tree
Author: Robert Barry
Publisher: Doubleday Books for Young Readers
ISBN: 0449810321
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 32
Book Description
Give the gift of holiday spirit with this classic picture book that celebrates how one Christmas tree brings joy to a whole forest of critters! Christmas is here and Mr. Willowby's tree has arrived. There's just one big problem: The tree is too tall for his parlor! He cuts off the top so it will fit, and soon the top of that tree is passed along again and again to bring holiday cheer to all the animals in the forest. Kids will love watching the tree move from home to home, and families will appreciate the subtle message of conservation and recycling, as the tree top spreads joy to all. This heartwarming story is the perfect way to start the yuletide season, and a warm addition to any family's festive holiday traditions.
Publisher: Doubleday Books for Young Readers
ISBN: 0449810321
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 32
Book Description
Give the gift of holiday spirit with this classic picture book that celebrates how one Christmas tree brings joy to a whole forest of critters! Christmas is here and Mr. Willowby's tree has arrived. There's just one big problem: The tree is too tall for his parlor! He cuts off the top so it will fit, and soon the top of that tree is passed along again and again to bring holiday cheer to all the animals in the forest. Kids will love watching the tree move from home to home, and families will appreciate the subtle message of conservation and recycling, as the tree top spreads joy to all. This heartwarming story is the perfect way to start the yuletide season, and a warm addition to any family's festive holiday traditions.
Christmas, Here I Come!
Author: D.J. Steinberg
Publisher: Penguin
ISBN: 0593094247
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 33
Book Description
Celebrate Christmas with a collection of funny and festive poems from the author of the hugely popular Kindergarten, Here I Come! It's the most wonderful time of the year, and everyone is getting into the Christmas spirit! From writing letters to Santa to picking the perfect tree, these heartwarming poems -- plus a page of stickers! -- from author D. J. Steinberg are sure to delight even the most sullen Scrooge.
Publisher: Penguin
ISBN: 0593094247
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 33
Book Description
Celebrate Christmas with a collection of funny and festive poems from the author of the hugely popular Kindergarten, Here I Come! It's the most wonderful time of the year, and everyone is getting into the Christmas spirit! From writing letters to Santa to picking the perfect tree, these heartwarming poems -- plus a page of stickers! -- from author D. J. Steinberg are sure to delight even the most sullen Scrooge.