Mommy Cusses PDF Download

Author: Dorman Serena
Publisher: Chronicle Books
ISBN: 1797206249
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 114

View

Book Description
For fans of Go the F*ck to Sleep, Mommy Cusses is a hilarious novelty parenting book full of tell-it-like-it-is quotes, snarky lists, and too-true anecdotes that will resonate with new moms everywhere. For new-ish mothers who need to laugh at the absurdity of parenting so they don't cry, who are looking for a we're-in-this-together sense of solidarity, and who don't have time to read a "real" book, here is a hilarious and highly relatable collection of mom malarkey. There are real-talk quotes, helpful lists (such as "How to Look Like You Have Your Act Together"), "mom-tivities," and quizzes, all delivered with a healthy dose of sarcasm. Packaged in a handy trim size with colorful illustrations throughout, Mommy Cusses is the perfect gift for moms and moms-to-be who need some comic relief. • GREAT GIFT: Mommy Cusses is super relatable and laugh-out-loud funny, making it an easy gift for Mother's Day or a baby shower, or an anytime gift for a parent. • PERENNIAL TOPIC: It doesn't take long to experience all the ups and downs of parenting. Mommy Cusses features timeless mommy humor that won't go out of style and a fresh look and feel that speaks to young parents. Perfect for: • Expectant parents and parents of children under 5 • Shoppers looking for a baby shower or Mother's Day gift for a friend, spouse, or daughter • Followers of the Mommy Cusses blog or Instagram account

Author: Ian Frazier
Publisher: Farrar, Straus and Giroux
ISBN: 0374709491
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 254

View

Book Description
Based on his widely read columns for The New Yorker, Ian Frazier's uproarious first novel, The Cursing Mommy's Book of Days, centers on a profoundly memorable character, sprung from an impressively fertile imagination. Structured as a daybook of sorts, the book follows the Cursing Mommy—beleaguered wife of Larry and mother of two boys, twelve and eight—as she tries (more or less) valiantly to offer tips on how to do various tasks around the home, only to end up on the ground, cursing, surrounded by broken glass. Her voice is somewhere between Phyllis Diller's and Sylvia Plath's: a hilariously desperate housewife with a taste for swearing and large glasses of red wine, who speaks to the frustrations of everyday life. Frazier has demonstrated an astonishing ability to operate with ease in a variety of registers: from On the Rez, an investigation into the lives of modern day Oglala Sioux written with a mix of humor, compassion, and imagination, to Dating Your Mom, a sidesplitting collection of humorous essays that imagines, among other things, how and why you might begin a romance with your mother. Here, Frazier tackles another genre with his usual grace and aplomb, as well as an extra helping of his trademark wicked wit. The Cursing Mommy's failures and weaknesses are our own—and Frazier gives them a loving, satirical spin that is uniquely his own.

Author: Nicole Knepper
Publisher: Penguin
ISBN: 110165094X
Category : Biography & Autobiography
Languages : en
Pages : 337

View

Book Description
If you feel like your kids are killing you, you’ve come to the right place. This irreverant, hilarious guide to the trials of motherhood makes the perfect gift for mom—or any woman with a huge heart and a mouth that sometimes needs washing out with soap. Attention all potty-mouthed, cheap-wine-drinking mothers: Prepare to meet your match. Any bad thought you’ve had about your kids, Nicole Knepper has had worse. Much worse. It’s not that she doesn’t love her kids. It’s that she understands what a mind-f*?% it can be to try to civilize those wild little beasts. Based on her hugely popular Facebook page, “Moms Who Drink and Swear,” this book reveals why family dinners are like herpes, how to avoid smashing toys that are being fought over, and the joy of hearing that your son has murdered his imaginary friend. As Nicole rants and raves about caring for children (without crushing their souls), family togetherness (without too many tears), the saving grace of girlfriends (and vodka), and love and marriage (and all the baggage that goes with them), she gets to the heart of what every exasperated mom is thinking, just much funnier.

Author: Katie Blackburn
Publisher: Faber & Faber
ISBN: 0571321526
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 36

View

Book Description
The day Mum didn't get dressed and went on strike, Dad called her 'a Wild Thing' and Mum said 'Cook your own dinner' and stomped off upstairs to have a bath . . . In this hilarious, touching homage to Maurice Sendak's Where the Wild Things Are, a worn-out mum finds herself floating across time and space to the place where the Wild Mums are. Dazzled by her party tricks, they crown her Queen of the Wild Mums and try to entice her to join their conga . . . But Mum has just remembered who she loves best of all . . . Lovingly illustrated by the award-winning Sholto Walker, this little book is the perfect gift for baby showers, new mums - or any mum who's ever wanted to go on strike.

Author: Gwenna Laithland
Publisher: St. Martin's Essentials
ISBN: 1250882672
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 148

View

Book Description
AN INSTANT NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER! Join the millions of fans who love Momma Cusses, TikTok’s #1 Parenting Unexpert! There are lots of experts out there who will tell you they have the magic recipe to raising perfect humans. Gwenna Laithland is not one of them. She’s one of us. Frustrated, overwhelmed, and exhausted. Her relatable representation of parenthood validates our experiences. In Momma Cusses, Gwenna uses her signature style of snark and sarcasm to explain her interpretation of responsive parenting vs. reactive parenting and outline the steps she takes to raise her kids. Whether you are a parent or someone who has had a parent, we all need to learn how to handle our emotional spirals responsively. Now we can all be in it together by tackling some of the hilarious yet all-too-real scenarios Gwenna outlines in her book, including: YOU WILL LOSE YOUR SH*T: Mom guilt vs. mom shame ARE YOU YELLING OR ARE YOU JUST BEING LOUD?: Get in control of your emotions THE BIG FEELS LOOP-DE-LOO: Get in control of their emotions Accessible, digestible, and rooted in reality, Momma Cusses helps readers with navigating family dynamics and cultivating emotional resilience for everyone.

Author: Bunmi Laditan
Publisher: Workman Publishing
ISBN: 076118564X
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 177

View

Book Description
Toddler a**holery is a normal part of human development—not unlike puberty, except this stage involves throwing food on the floor and taking swings at people who pay your way in life. For parents of toddlers, it's a "you better laugh so you don't cry" period. Bunmi Laditan's hilarious, satirical guide to toddlerhood offers parents instant (and very welcome) comic relief—along with the very good news that "It's Not Your Fault." Chapters cover the cost of raising a toddler, feeding your toddler, potty-training, tantrums, how to manage the holidays, and "how not to die inside." Parents will see themselves in the very funny sections on taking your toddler to restaurants ("One parent will spend their time walking your toddler around the restaurant and outside like a cocker spaniel, while the other, luckier parent will eat alone."), Things You Thought You'd Never Say That You Now Say As a Parent of a Toddler ("I can tell you're pooping because your eyes are watering."), and how to order pizza ("Spend $40 on pizza delivery. Listen to your toddler cry for 30 minutes about how the pizza is all wrong. Watch your toddler take a small bite of crust. Google 'can anger give you a heart attack?' Start the bedtime routine."). Laditan's wildly funny voice has attracted hundreds of thousands of fans of Honest Toddler on social media; here she speaks parent-to-tired-parent, easing the pains and challenges of raising toddlers with a hefty dose of adult humor and wit.

Author: Meredith Masony
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1982117974
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 256

View

Book Description
From the founder of That’s Inappropriate—one of the most popular parenting blogs on the web—comes a hilarious, genuine, and relatable essay collection on the ups and downs of motherhood. Meredith Masony founded That’s Inappropriate in 2014 as an innocent and humorous way to chronicle her chaotic days as a working mom, child wrangler, and busy wife. It soon evolved into a massive, dynamic community of parents—now nearly three million strong—brought together by their shared belief that parenthood and marriage don’t have to be perfect. Now, in Ask Me What’s for Dinner One More Time, Meredith shares her collection of witty essays on the universal frustrations of being a mom in today’s world, presenting her laugh-out-loud perspective on sex, aging, anxiety, friendship, and much more. Perfect for fans of Jenny Lawson, Laura Clery, and Jen Mann, these essays provide laughter, relief, validation, and “a metaphorical hug for all of those moments you spend crying on your bathroom floor, thinking that you are failing at the hardest job on the planet.”

Author: Osheta Moore
Publisher: Herald Press
ISBN: 9781513801513
Category : Religion
Languages : en
Pages : 0

View

Book Description
Like a lot of women, blogger Osheta Moore loved the idea of shalom: God’s dream for a world that is whole, vibrant, and flourishing. But honestly: who's got the time? So one night she whispered a dangerous prayer: God, show me the things that make for peace… In Shalom Sistas, Moore shares what she learned when she challenged herself to study peace in the Bible for forty days. Taking readers through the twelve points of the Shalom Sistas’ Manifesto, Moore experiments with practices of everyday peacemaking and invites readers to do the same. From dropping “love bombs” on a family vacation, to talking to the coach who called her son the n-word, to spreading shalom with a Swiffer, Moore offers bold steps for crossing lines between black and white, suburban and urban, rich and poor. What if a bunch of Jesus-following women catch a vision of a vibrant, whole, flourishing world? What happens when Shalom Sistas unite? Free downloadable study guide available here.

Author: Colleen Hoover
Publisher: Grand Central Publishing
ISBN: 153872474X
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 295

View

Book Description
Whose truth is the lie? Stay up all night reading the sensational psychological thriller that has readers obsessed, from the #1 New York Times bestselling author of Too Late and It Ends With Us. #1 New York Times Bestseller · USA Today Bestseller · Globe and Mail Bestseller · Publishers Weekly Bestseller Lowen Ashleigh is a struggling writer on the brink of financial ruin when she accepts the job offer of a lifetime. Jeremy Crawford, husband of bestselling author Verity Crawford, has hired Lowen to complete the remaining books in a successful series his injured wife is unable to finish. Lowen arrives at the Crawford home, ready to sort through years of Verity’s notes and outlines, hoping to find enough material to get her started. What Lowen doesn’t expect to uncover in the chaotic office is an unfinished autobiography Verity never intended for anyone to read. Page after page of bone-chilling admissions, including Verity's recollection of the night her family was forever altered. Lowen decides to keep the manuscript hidden from Jeremy, knowing its contents could devastate the already grieving father. But as Lowen’s feelings for Jeremy begin to intensify, she recognizes all the ways she could benefit if he were to read his wife’s words. After all, no matter how devoted Jeremy is to his injured wife, a truth this horrifying would make it impossible for him to continue loving her.

Author: Chronicle Books
Publisher: Chronicle Books
ISBN: 1797212036
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 111

View

Book Description
Essential guidance for new parents in bite-size form, this refresh of a classic deck from the bestselling 52 series is a perfect baby shower gift. Every new parent could use a little help—and a lot of encouragement. This updated version of a favorite deck from the beloved 52 series is full of reassurance and advice to smooth the transition into parenthood. With 52 cards offering guidance on everything from how to get sleep to how to stay calm (even when the baby isn't), these cards are a wellspring of welcome wisdom for new parents, boiled down into quick tips easy to read on any schedule. CONVENIENT AND HANDY: This deck is an easy way to process a year's worth of parenting life-hacks whenever is convenient. CUTE BABY SHOWER GIFT: With charming illustrations and a petite package, this little box of parenting know-how makes an easy gift pick for new parents. Perfect for: • New parents looking for a quick and convenient advice