You Are a F*cking Awesome Mom PDF Download

Author: Leslie Anne Bruce
Publisher: Seal Press
ISBN: 1580058914
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 238

View

Book Description
A much-needed voice of encouragement for every woman who had a baby and lost her mind Sometimes, motherhood feels never-ending. A child is born, chaos ensues, and it seems like life will never return to normal. In You Are a F*cking Awesome Mom, award-winning journalist and Instagram star Leslie Anne Bruce acknowledges that, yes, motherhood is a total mind f*ck—but then she offers the self-empowerment lessons new mothers need to get through the psychic upheaval and emerge stronger than ever. After childbirth, a woman's body, her relationships, and her very sense of self are tested like never before. Bruce encourages readers to look past the sugarcoated truisms about the miracles of child-rearing in order to embrace the real joys of motherhood, spit-up stains and all. Loaded with unfettered support from a mom who has been through it all, You Are a F*cking Awesome Mom offers a lifeline of encouragement, inspiration, and community for the new mama who got a baby, lost her mind, and desperately wants to find herself again.

Author: Jen Mann
Publisher: Ballantine Books
ISBN: 0345549988
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 226

View

Book Description
NATIONAL BESTSELLER • A debut collection of witty, biting essays laced with a surprising warmth, from Jen Mann, the writer behind the popular blog People I Want to Punch in the Throat People I want to punch in the throat: • anyone who feels the need to bling her washer and dryer • humblebraggers • people who treat their pets like children Jen Mann doesn’t have a filter, which sometimes gets her in trouble with her neighbors, her fellow PTA moms, and that one woman who tried to sell her sex toys at a home shopping party. Known for her hilariously acerbic observations on her blog, People I Want to Punch in the Throat, Mann now brings her sharp wit to bear on suburban life, marriage, and motherhood in this laugh-out-loud collection of essays. From the politics of joining a play group, to the thrill of mothers’ night out at the gun range, to the rewards of your most meaningful relationship (the one you have with your cleaning lady), nothing is sacred or off-limits. So the next time you find yourself wearing fuzzy bunny pajamas in the school carpool line or accidentally stuck at a co-worker’s swingers party, just think, What would Jen Mann do? Or better yet, buy her book. Praise for People I Want to Punch in the Throat “People I Want to Punch in the Throat is so good that it’ll make you want to adopt all the cats in the world. I’m not sure about the correlation, but it’s that good. It should come with a warning.”—Jenny Lawson, author of Let’s Pretend This Never Happened “Jen Mann has an amazing way of telling stories that will make you cringe and burst out laughing at the same time. From swinger parties to racist toddlers, she makes the suburbs unbelievably funny.”—Karen Alpert, author of I Heart My Little A-Holes “Jen Mann says the things we’re all too afraid to say. Her honest and hilarious writing style reminds me of David Sedaris and Tina Fey.”—Robin O’Bryant, author of Ketchup Is a Vegetable: And Other Lies Moms Tell Themselves “Jen Mann’s shrewd and unrelenting assault on the absurdity of suburban life is an honest peek into the occasional nightmare that is part of living the American dream. I love Jen. I wish she was my neighbor. It’s so refreshing to know that I’m not the only one who wants to punch almost everyone in the f***ing throat.”—Nicole Knepper, author of Moms Who Drink And Swear

Author: Allie Brosh
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1451666187
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 288

View

Book Description
#1 New York Times Bestseller “Funny and smart as hell” (Bill Gates), Allie Brosh’s Hyperbole and a Half showcases her unique voice, leaping wit, and her ability to capture complex emotions with deceptively simple illustrations. FROM THE PUBLISHER: Every time Allie Brosh posts something new on her hugely popular blog Hyperbole and a Half the internet rejoices. This full-color, beautifully illustrated edition features more than fifty percent new content, with ten never-before-seen essays and one wholly revised and expanded piece as well as classics from the website like, “The God of Cake,” “Dogs Don’t Understand Basic Concepts Like Moving,” and her astonishing, “Adventures in Depression,” and “Depression Part Two,” which have been hailed as some of the most insightful meditations on the disease ever written. Brosh’s debut marks the launch of a major new American humorist who will surely make even the biggest scrooge or snob laugh. We dare you not to. FROM THE AUTHOR: This is a book I wrote. Because I wrote it, I had to figure out what to put on the back cover to explain what it is. I tried to write a long, third-person summary that would imply how great the book is and also sound vaguely authoritative—like maybe someone who isn’t me wrote it—but I soon discovered that I’m not sneaky enough to pull it off convincingly. So I decided to just make a list of things that are in the book: Pictures Words Stories about things that happened to me Stories about things that happened to other people because of me Eight billion dollars* Stories about dogs The secret to eternal happiness* *These are lies. Perhaps I have underestimated my sneakiness!

Author: Kristin Hannah
Publisher: St. Martin's Press
ISBN: 1429927844
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 532

View

Book Description
From the New York Times bestselling author Kristin Hannah comes a powerful novel of love, loss, and the magic of friendship. . . . now a #1 Netflix series! In the turbulent summer of 1974, Kate Mularkey has accepted her place at the bottom of the eighth-grade social food chain. Then, to her amazement, the "coolest girl in the world" moves in across the street and wants to be her friend. Tully Hart seems to have it all—beauty, brains, ambition. On the surface they are as opposite as two people can be: Kate, doomed to be forever uncool, with a loving family who mortifies her at every turn. Tully, steeped in glamour and mystery, but with a secret that is destroying her. They make a pact to be best friends forever; by summer's end they've become TullyandKate. Inseparable. So begins Kristin Hannah's magnificent new novel. Spanning more than three decades and playing out across the ever-changing face of the Pacific Northwest, Firefly Lane is the poignant, powerful story of two women and the friendship that becomes the bulkhead of their lives. From the beginning, Tully is desperate to prove her worth to the world. Abandoned by her mother at an early age, she longs to be loved unconditionally. In the glittering, big-hair era of the eighties, she looks to men to fill the void in her soul. But in the buttoned-down nineties, it is television news that captivates her. She will follow her own blind ambition to New York and around the globe, finding fame and success . . . and loneliness. Kate knows early on that her life will be nothing special. Throughout college, she pretends to be driven by a need for success, but all she really wants is to fall in love and have children and live an ordinary life. In her own quiet way, Kate is as driven as Tully. What she doesn't know is how being a wife and mother will change her . . . how she'll lose sight of who she once was, and what she once wanted. And how much she'll envy her famous best friend. . . . For thirty years, Tully and Kate buoy each other through life, weathering the storms of friendship—jealousy, anger, hurt, resentment. They think they've survived it all until a single act of betrayal tears them apart . . . and puts their courage and friendship to the ultimate test. Firefly Lane is for anyone who ever drank Boone's Farm apple wine while listening to Abba or Fleetwood Mac. More than a coming-of-age novel, it's the story of a generation of women who were both blessed and cursed by choices. It's about promises and secrets and betrayals. And ultimately, about the one person who really, truly knows you—and knows what has the power to hurt you . . . and heal you. Firefly Lane is a story you'll never forget . . . one you'll want to pass on to your best friend.

Author: Jody Kaye
Publisher: Jody Kaye
ISBN:
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 346

View

Book Description
—GATLIN— My penance for blowing it on a hot mic was spinning tunes at an upscale beach resort. But I'm returning to my ultimate career, and training Boston Belle, my replacement, is a just reward. Not my usual type, the raven-haired beauty stands up to me to prove she's the better DJ. After seven nights in paradise, it’s hard to leave her alone. Despite my big mouth and my new boss keeping me on a short leash, my radio show is winning the ratings war. Everything’s smooth sailing… Until I find a baby on my doorstep. Overnight, I’m a single dad, expected to rock the jukebox in the wee hours of the morning and my little girl at night. —BELLAMY— Raised by a single mom, I never knew my father. Except, it's beyond hope Gatlin understands I didn't show up at Kingsbrier to cash in. Unfortunately, my life went from bad to worse as soon as I stepped into the small town. Now, I'm trying to earn the trust of a former bad boy. Abandoning our daughter was an accident, and I don't want to let her out of my reach. Though, I’m positive my dream of playing music always will be. But when our baby girl wraps Gatlin around her little finger, am I selfish to wish a good man loved me, too? Gatlin and Bellamy’s Small Town Baby on the Doorstep Romance is perfect for readers who love a second chance romance between characters drawn together by instant attraction and separated by circumstances beyond their control. With an enemies to lovers vibe, Love Me Fast is a full-length sudden baby romance between a strong-willed heroine and a playboy hero. This book has a guaranteed happily ever after and features the sometimes meddlesome family in Jody Kaye’s continuing best selling, southern small town saga, the Kingsbrier Quintuplets and the Kingsbrier Legacy series’.

Author: Dr. Sheryl G. Ziegler
Publisher: HarperCollins
ISBN: 0062683705
Category : Social Science
Languages : en
Pages : 293

View

Book Description
The ultimate must-read handbook for the modern mother: a practical, and positive tool to help free women from the debilitating notion of being the "perfect mom," filled with funny and all too relatable true-life stories and realistic suggestions to stop the burnout cycle, and protect our kids from the damage burnout can cause. Moms, do you feel tired? Overwhelmed? Have you continually put off the things you need to do for you? Do you feel like it’s all worth it because your kids are happy? Are you "over" being a mother? If you answered yes to these questions, you’re not alone. Parents today want to create the ideal childhood for their children. Women strive to be the picture-perfect Pinterest mother that looks amazing, hosts the best birthday parties in town, posts the most "liked" photos, and serves delicious, nutritious home-cooked meals in her neat, organized home after ferrying the kids to school and a host of extracurricular activities on time. This drive, while noble, can also be destructive, causing stress and anxiety that leads to "mommy burnout." Psychologist and family counselor Dr. Sheryl Ziegler is well-versed in the stress that moms face, and the burden of guilt they carry because they often feel like they aren’t doing enough for their kids’ happiness. A mother of three herself, Dr. Z—as she’s affectionately known by her many patients—recognizes and understands that modern moms are all too often plagued by exhaustion, failure, isolation, self-doubt, and a general lack of self-love, and their families are also feeling the effects, too. Over the last nineteen years working with families and children, Dr. Z has devised a prescriptive program for addressing "mommy burnout"—teaching moms that they can learn to re-energize themselves and still feel good about their families and their lives. In this warm and empathetic guide, she examines this modern epidemic among mothers who put their children’s happiness above their own, and offers empowering, proven solutions for alleviating this condition, saving marriages and keeping kids happy in the process.

Author: Bijou Hunter
Publisher: Snowdrop Fridays Publishing
ISBN:
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 219

View

Book Description
HEAT ღ HUMOR ღ HEA Sylvie Majors is a hellion with fire in her veins and a pistol for a mouth. The eighteen-year-old nurses a very specific fantasy about her future, refusing to yield to anything less. Now, she’s come face to face with her one-and-only love. It’s time for Sylvie to put up or shut up. Ronan Byrne spent decades creating a protective wall around his life. The number of people the crime boss truly trusts can be counted on one hand. He has no desire for romance, let alone a wife and children. Sylvie and Ronan might embrace contradictory plans for the future. But they’re about to learn love can overcome even the most stubborn hearts. "Stone Cold Awesome" contains graphic sexual content, violent situations, harsh language, and drug use. The book is only appropriate for adult readers aged 18+.

Author: Shayna Ferm
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 0757320562
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 269

View

Book Description
For over four years, Ferm and Tee have been performing to sold-out audiences across the country. The Pump and Dump Show is a fun and rowdy evening of comedy, singing, games, prizes, drinking, cursing and commiseration, with a clear and universal theme: Parenting is screwed up and hilarious, and we're all just doing the best we can. Motherhood is wonderful for many reasons, but moments of clarity are so often outweighed by public outbursts, poison control phone calls and poop (everywhere!) it's difficult to stop and realize that it's not always a direct reflection of our parenting skills. This gift book is a collection of segments from Ferm and Tee's popular show, including: The Most F**ked Up Thing Your Kid Has Done Recently cards. One of the most popular segments of the show, members of the audience write down crazy and memorable things their kids have done. It is hysterical, cathartic, and never disappoints. Sad Cake moments. Ever eaten cake that was just kind of sad? It's a situation, happen-stance or object that is a bit of a bummer, like getting in a fight on date night or getting puked on when there is no wine in the house. #SadCake Stump the Breeder trivia questions. So you think making a person makes you an expert on making a person? Test your knowledge by answering "extremely difficult" questions so you feel like you know what you're doing. Awesome MOMents. Games for moms to play when and if they ever get a night with friends, like: The Parentally Incorrect Drinking Game—If you've done it, you drink. If you haven't done it, you drink. Lies We Tell Ourselves Before We Have Kids. I'll still hang out after the kids go to bed. Yes you will. But not with your friends. With a glass of wine to help you forget the smell of spit up.

Author: Kristen Ashley
Publisher: Rock Chick LLC
ISBN: 1954680325
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 461

View

Book Description
Wyn and Remy Gastineau were perfect together… Until, without warning, Remy walks out on their life, their love and their marriage. Wyn is blindsided and heartbroken. It takes her years to get over the loss of Remy. Sometime later, their children call a family meeting and Remy is acting strange. Wyn refuses to hope. Remy has moved on. She must do the same. But she’s wrong. Remy wants her back and he’s pulling no punches. He’s determined to do the work to piece together the marriage he shattered. Forced by circumstances to tell Wyn things he never wanted her to know, Remy reveals his tragic secrets. As the family reels from pain long buried now laid bared, Wyn realizes instead of letting go, she has to hold tight to the man and the family they made that’s perfect together. “…the deep bonds of family, the imperfectly perfect characters, the REAL LIFE and real love. The story is immaculate.” -Verve Romance

Author: Melissa Pearl
Publisher: Forever Love Publishing Ltd
ISBN:
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 289

View

Book Description
He can’t let go of the past... And it might cost him a future with the woman he loves... Nate knows how to solve crimes. He’s dedicated his entire life to the force, sacrificing everything in his desperate attempt to absolve himself of the guilt he feels over his own mother’s unsolved death. Sally loves Nate, but three years of waiting for him has proven one thing: his career will always come first. Not her. Frustrated by his constant absence, Sally does the unthinkable. She walks away. Devastated by the break-up, Nate throws himself into a Jane Doe case. But he soon discovers that solving yet another crime does nothing to fill the hole inside him. To make matters worse, Sally is moving on and he doesn’t know if he can ever win her back. But he has to try…especially when unforeseen circumstances put Sally’s life in danger. Especially because he might be the only one who can save her. You’ll love Dark Horse, because of its heart-wrenching romance, nail-biting tension and twists you won’t see coming.