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Author: Matthew Parris Publisher: Profile Books ISBN: 1782832971 Category : Humor Languages : en Pages : 400
Book Description
'He's 100% political herpes. Back in six months whatever you do. Or three days, like last time.' Camilla Long on Nigel Farage 'You're as ugly as a salad.' Bulgarian insult 'I'm going to beat him so bad he'll need a shoehorn to put his hat on.' Muhammed Ali There's no pleasure like a perfectly turned put-down (when it's directed at somebody else, of course) but Matthew Parris's Scorn is sharply different from the standard collections. Here are the funniest, sharpest, rudest and most devastating insults in history, from ancient Roman graffiti to the battlefields of Twitter. Drawing on bile from such masters as Dorothy Parker, Elizabeth I, Donald Trump, Groucho Marx, Princess Anne, Winston Churchill, Nigel Farage, Mae West and Alastair Campbell - which form an exchange between voices down the ages - Scorn shows that abuse can be an art form. This collection includes extended literary invective as well as short verbal shin-kicks. Encompassing literature, art, politics, showbiz, marriage, gender, nationality and religion, Matthew Parris's sublime collection is the perfect companion for the festive season, whether you're searching for the perfect elegant riposte, the rudest polite letter ever written, or a brutal verbal sledgehammer.
Author: Matthew Parris Publisher: ISBN: 9780241968291 Category : Great Britain Languages : en Pages : 544
Book Description
A modern Conservative long before? The Conservative party became modern . . . Chastised by Margaret Thatcher for jumping into the Thames to save a dog, Matthew Parris was never destined for high office. In fact his life choices suggest he was an outsider even when he was in: he turned down MI6 because he was gay - only to become a Tory MP. Yet his years on the backbenches and as a parliamentary sketch writer and columnist have placed him in a unique position - part participant, part bystander - to witness Westminster and all its foibles. In this expanded new edition Parris reflects on a decade which has seen tremendous changes in his personal life (the death of his father; a civil partnership) and in the public life about which he still writes: the fall of Labour, the financial crisis and the current turmoil in a Tory party which still retains his loyalty but which exasperates him beyond measure. Winner of the Channel 4/Politico's Political Book of the Year Award 'Made me laugh out loud. A book full of wisdom.' Simon Hoggart, Guardian 'Brilliant, deliciously entertaining.' Observer 'Of interest to students and lovers of politics. Parris is a skilful entertainer, who informs as well as amuses.' Literary Review 'Whimsy, polemic, irony, humour. A scintillating read.' Boris Johnson, Sunday Telegraph
Author: Matthew Paris Publisher: Alan Sutton Publishing ISBN: 9780750905237 Category : England Languages : en Pages : 210
Book Description
A monk's chronicle offers a record of life and events in 13th-century England and further afield. Colour reproductions of the original manuscript decorations add to the detail.
Author: Matthew Parris Publisher: Robson ISBN: 9781861057365 Category : Biography & Autobiography Languages : en Pages : 484
Book Description
Scandalously it's been business as usual in parliament despite Tony Blair's promise of a new dawn over Britain in 1997. Conmen, secret home loans, walks on the wild side, liars, ridiculously expensive wallpaper and a jailed peer-cum-celebrated author have joined the prostitutes, gropers, shady share dealers, rent boys and Soviet spies that have been such a colourful feature of politics for five centuries. In this comprehensively updated edition of the bestselling 'Great Parliamentary Scandals', Matthew Parris and Kevin Maguire shine an entertaining and highly revealing light into the murky underworld of British parliamentary life, exposing the low side of high office.
Author: Matthew Parris Publisher: Penguin UK ISBN: 0670919292 Category : Humor Languages : en Pages : 384
Book Description
Up till 2006, a British Ambassador quitting his post abroad would write a valedictory despatch circulated widely across government, from other far-flung members of the service to the Prime Minister himself. This was the parting shot, the opportunity to offer a personal view of the country he was leaving- the alcoholic intake of its population, the corruption of its ministers, the state of the capital's drains, or the impossibility of getting embassy staff to clean British guests' shoes - whatever he or she wanted to get off their chest. Often funny, frequently astute and almost always gloriously non-politically correct, these parting shots shed light on Britian's place in the world, and reveal the curious cocktail of priviledge and privation which make up the life of an ambassador abroad. 'There is, I fear, no question but that the average Nicaraguan is one of the most dishonest, unreliable, violent and alcholic of the Latin Americans' Roger Pinsent, Managua, 1967 'The detention of the Pinochet made life in Chile unusually interesting... I have never received quite so many death threats' Dame Glynne Evans, Lisbon, 2004
Author: Matthew Parris Publisher: Viking ISBN: 9780241957080 Category : Ambassadors Languages : en Pages : 0
Book Description
Drawn from the National Archives and from Freedom of Information requests these dispatches make up another volume of entertaining and illuminating stories from the diplomatic bag.