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Author: Steven D. Price Publisher: Rowman & Littlefield ISBN: 1493041207 Category : Reference Languages : en Pages : 343
Book Description
Here are1,237 laugh-out-loud quotes, quips, and jokes, all in one packed-to-the-brim volume. Yes, folks, sit back and enjoy this collection of inadvertent gaffes, thigh-slappers, puns, and everything and anything else that'll tickle your funny bone. There’s something old, something new, something stolen, and something blue—from favorite comedians, sports and political figures, and literary wits. There are even giggles for the kids and groaners for the grown-ups. Just a few among the 1,237 funniest things ever said: “I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They’ve experienced pain and bought jewelry.”—Rita Rudner “I don’t know if it’s good for baseball, but it sure beats the hell out of rooming with Phil Rizzuto.”—Yogi Berra on being told that Joe DiMaggio was to marry Marilyn Monroe “I made my money the old-fashioned way. I was very nice to a wealthy relative right before he died.”—Malcolm Forbes “The Dalai Lama visited the White House and told the President that he could teach him to find a higher state of consciousness. Then, after talking to Bush for a few minutes, he said, ‘You know what? Let’s just grab lunch.’”—Bill Maher
Author: Steven D. Price Publisher: Rowman & Littlefield ISBN: 1493041207 Category : Reference Languages : en Pages : 343
Book Description
Here are1,237 laugh-out-loud quotes, quips, and jokes, all in one packed-to-the-brim volume. Yes, folks, sit back and enjoy this collection of inadvertent gaffes, thigh-slappers, puns, and everything and anything else that'll tickle your funny bone. There’s something old, something new, something stolen, and something blue—from favorite comedians, sports and political figures, and literary wits. There are even giggles for the kids and groaners for the grown-ups. Just a few among the 1,237 funniest things ever said: “I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They’ve experienced pain and bought jewelry.”—Rita Rudner “I don’t know if it’s good for baseball, but it sure beats the hell out of rooming with Phil Rizzuto.”—Yogi Berra on being told that Joe DiMaggio was to marry Marilyn Monroe “I made my money the old-fashioned way. I was very nice to a wealthy relative right before he died.”—Malcolm Forbes “The Dalai Lama visited the White House and told the President that he could teach him to find a higher state of consciousness. Then, after talking to Bush for a few minutes, he said, ‘You know what? Let’s just grab lunch.’”—Bill Maher
Author: Steven Price Publisher: 1001 ISBN: 9781493041190 Category : Literary Collections Languages : en Pages : 344
Book Description
A collection of the greatest witticisms from the world of politics, show business, sports, and anywhere else people can get a good laugh Here are a thousand and one laugh-out-loud quotes, quips, and jokes, all in one packed-to-the-brim volume. Yes, folks, sit back and enjoy this collection of inadvertent gaffes, thigh-slappers, puns, and everything and anything else that'll tickle your funny bone. There's something old, something new, something stolen, and something blue--from favorite comedians, sports and political figures, and literary wits. There are even giggles for the kids and groaners for the grown-ups. Just a few among the 1,001 funniest things ever said: "So, where's the Cannes Film Festival being held this year?"--Christina Aguilera "Fame means when your computer modem is broken, the repair guy comes out to your house a little faster." --Sandra Bullock "Recession is when your neighbor loses his job. Depression is when you lose yours. And recovery is when Jimmy Carter loses his." --Ronald Reagan
Author: Publisher: Random House ISBN: 0091924510 Category : American wit and humor Languages : en Pages : 578
Book Description
"From Samuel Johnson's 'I am willing to love all mankind, except an American', to Richard Nixon's classic, 'Politics would be a helluva good business if it weren't for the goddamned people', the 6000 hilarious quotations in this title are certain to have anyone with a sense of humour rolling on the floor. Spanning every topic, from religion and celebrities to politics and love, this gem of a book includes classic wise-cracks (and not-so-wise-words) from the likes of Oscar Wilde, Steve Martin, Homer Simpson and Karl Marx, as well as hundreds of fresh funnies!"--Publisher's description.
Author: All Things Journal Publisher: ISBN: 9781080109517 Category : Languages : en Pages : 114
Book Description
The Funny Things Friends Say This handy size journal has given you plenty of room to write down all the funny, amusing or moving quotes and sayings that you will love to record and remember your friends by. This beautifully made and bound notebook has a unique and amusing design with a blank page in-between to stop any ink bleed or impression damage. This also gives you extra room for your own comments, thoughts and memories. Product Description: 6"x.9" 112 pages Uniquely designed cover High quality, white paper Matte cover Check out our other great notebooks and journals, by clicking on the "Author Name" link just below the title of this journal. Other Ideas On Who Would Love This Notebook Best Friends Gift Anniversary Gift Wedding Gift Graduation Gift End of School Year Gift Ideal for Nurse Week Gift Thank You Nurse Gift Nurse Appreciation Gift Scroll up and Look Inside and then Click BUY NOW to get this great Notebook TODAY
Author: John Kennedy Toole Publisher: Grove/Atlantic, Inc. ISBN: 0802197620 Category : Fiction Languages : en Pages : 414
Book Description
Winner of the Pulitzer Prize “A masterwork . . . the novel astonishes with its inventiveness . . . it is nothing less than a grand comic fugue.”—The New York Times Book Review A Confederacy of Dunces is an American comic masterpiece. John Kennedy Toole's hero, one Ignatius J. Reilly, is "huge, obese, fractious, fastidious, a latter-day Gargantua, a Don Quixote of the French Quarter. His story bursts with wholly original characters, denizens of New Orleans' lower depths, incredibly true-to-life dialogue, and the zaniest series of high and low comic adventures" (Henry Kisor, Chicago Sun-Times).
Author: Ned Vizzini Publisher: Disney Electronic Content ISBN: 1423141083 Category : Juvenile Fiction Languages : en Pages : 452
Book Description
Like many ambitious New York City teenagers, Craig Gilner sees entry into Manhattan's Executive Pre-Professional High School as the ticket to his future. Determined to succeed at life—which means getting into the right high school to get into the right college to get the right job—Craig studies night and day to ace the entrance exam, and does. That's when things start to get crazy. At his new school, Craig realizes that he isn't brilliant compared to the other kids; he's just average, and maybe not even that. He soon sees his once-perfect future crumbling away.
Author: David E. Johnson Publisher: Taylor Trade Publications ISBN: 9781589791503 Category : History Languages : en Pages : 260
Book Description
This book profiles eighteen of our funniest elections, from 1828, the first election in which all states had electors, to the election from hell in 2000. The book also includes chapters on Watergate and impeachment, and a gallery of official photographs.
Author: Steven D. Price Publisher: Rowman & Littlefield ISBN: 1493029436 Category : Reference Languages : en Pages : 353
Book Description
A collection of stupid utterances, mostly unintentional--although not always--from politics, show business, sports, and anywhere else people can put their feet in their mouths. Based on recorded history, it's safe to say that dumb remarks have been with us since the invention of writing. Young or old, rich or poor, famous or unknown, people of all generations and cultures have seized the opportunity to say something dumb - stupidity has always been an equal opportunity employer. In celebration of such mental lapses and pure idiocy, here is a collection of stupid utterances, unintentional and otherwise, from the worlds of politics, radio, television, newspapers, show business, sports, and literature - and everywhere else people can - and have - put their feet in their mouths.
Author: Glenn W. Martin Publisher: iUniverse ISBN: 0595792987 Category : Humor Languages : en Pages : 212
Book Description
This collection of stories was written for only one purpose-to make you laugh! These stories are not aimed at your mind, but at your funny bone. They are not supposed to make you smarter or wiser, but might keep you from taking yourself and life too seriously. When enjoying these stories, you may venture into restaurants or churches, attend weddings or funerals, and spend some time in the Army. And you may meet people who did not intend to be funny, but did funny things. These stories should put a smile on your face, and a chuckle in your voice. And if you laugh out loud, that would be okay, too. Laughter is not only good for your health, but it also does wonders for your spirit and your soul.