The Everything Kids' Gross Jokes Book PDF Download

Author: Aileen Weintraub
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1440523630
Category : Juvenile Nonfiction
Languages : en
Pages : 266

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Book Description
Guaranteed to make you gag! If you're up for some side-splitting and stomach-churning laughs, grab The Everything KIDS' Gross Jokes Book as fast as you can! It's packed with hundreds of one-liners and knock-knocks to make you turn green! Make your way through sick sections such as: The Gross-Store There's Grime in My Slime! Everybody Oozes Who Among Us Is a Fungus? Dead Fly Pie Chock full of puzzles, games, and activities, The Everything KIDS' Gross Jokes Book scores a perfect 10 on the Gross-o-meter! Knock Knock Who's there Consumption Consumption who? Consumption be done about the foul odor in here? Why did the bacteria cross the playground? To get to the other slide. Why was the cross-eyed teacher so upset? He couldn't control his pupils.

Author: Chris Harris
Publisher: Little, Brown Books for Young Readers
ISBN: 0316266590
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 196

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Book Description
The instant New York Times bestseller featured on NPR's Weekend Edition with Scott Simon! B. J. Novak (bestselling author of The Book With No Pictures) described this groundbreaking poetry collection as "Smart and sweet, wild and wicked, brilliantly funny--it's everything a book for kids should be." Lauded by critics as a worthy heir to such greats as Silverstein, Seuss, Nash and Lear, Harris's hilarious debut molds wit and wordplay, nonsense and oxymoron, and visual and verbal sleight-of-hand in masterful ways that make you look at the world in a whole new wonderfully upside-down way. With enthusiastic endorsements from bestselling luminaries such as Lemony Snicket, Judith Viorst, Andrea Beaty, and many others, this entirely unique collection offers a surprise around every corner. Adding to the fun: Lane Smith, bestselling creator of beloved hits like It's a Book and The Stinky Cheese Man and Other Fairly Stupid Tales, has spectacularly illustrated this extraordinary collection with nearly one hundred pieces of appropriately absurd art. It's a mischievous match made in heaven! "Ridiculous, nonsensical, peculiar, outrageous, possibly deranged--and utterly, totally, absolutely delicious. Read it! Immediately!" --Judith Viorst, bestselling author of Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

Author: Julie Winterbottom
Publisher: Workman Publishing
ISBN: 0761167560
Category : Juvenile Nonfiction
Languages : en
Pages : 240

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Book Description
Collects practical jokes of different difficulties, from sabotaging a victim's drink to short-sheeting a bed to fake lottery cards.

Author: Kristin Hensley
Publisher: HarperCollins
ISBN: 0062857703
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 249

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Book Description
NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER Has it been months since you’ve read a book with actual adult words that had nothing to do with farm animals or superheroes or going potty? Well then, it’s time to take a break. Pour yourself some wine. Put on your comfy pants. All good? Ok, welcome to the party. Kristin Hensley and Jen Smedley, the creators of #IMOMSOHARD, know that you probably didn’t get to shower today and that the last thing you need is more advice on how to be a better parent. Instead, they invite you to join their laugh-out-loud, best friend banter on the eighty bajillion ways moms give their all every day—including: I KEEP IT TOGETHER SO HARD I BODY AFTER BABY SO HARD I HIT THE TOWN (AND AM IN BED BY 9:30 P.M.) SO HARD I BUST MY ASS SO HARD I KEEP FOOLS ALIVE SO HARD Come for the laughs, stay for the kinship with two friends who are just getting it right, getting it wrong, and leaning on each other for a laugh at the end of the day. They don’t care if your house is a mess and they won’t judge you if you pee a little when you sneeze.So kick back, relax, and enjoy. You deserve it.

Author: Colleen Hoover
Publisher: Grand Central Publishing
ISBN: 153872474X
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 295

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Book Description
Whose truth is the lie? Stay up all night reading the sensational psychological thriller that has readers obsessed, from the #1 New York Times bestselling author of Too Late and It Ends With Us. #1 New York Times Bestseller · USA Today Bestseller · Globe and Mail Bestseller · Publishers Weekly Bestseller Lowen Ashleigh is a struggling writer on the brink of financial ruin when she accepts the job offer of a lifetime. Jeremy Crawford, husband of bestselling author Verity Crawford, has hired Lowen to complete the remaining books in a successful series his injured wife is unable to finish. Lowen arrives at the Crawford home, ready to sort through years of Verity’s notes and outlines, hoping to find enough material to get her started. What Lowen doesn’t expect to uncover in the chaotic office is an unfinished autobiography Verity never intended for anyone to read. Page after page of bone-chilling admissions, including Verity's recollection of the night her family was forever altered. Lowen decides to keep the manuscript hidden from Jeremy, knowing its contents could devastate the already grieving father. But as Lowen’s feelings for Jeremy begin to intensify, she recognizes all the ways she could benefit if he were to read his wife’s words. After all, no matter how devoted Jeremy is to his injured wife, a truth this horrifying would make it impossible for him to continue loving her.

Author: Evan C Thomas
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1440576971
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 272

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Book Description
Inside this sidesplitting collection, you'll find only the most popular kinds of jokes, riddles, and funnies from a dynamic professional comedian. This book is sure to tickle your funny bone-- and make you the life of the party!

Author: Blake Wilson
Publisher: Three Rivers Press (CA)
ISBN: 0451495500
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 66

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Book Description
"When Blake Wilson bought a Batman mask on a whim while shopping with his kids, he had no idea that the short video he filmed of himself wearing it on his way home would be viewed by millions and launch the start of an alter ego: BatDad. Soon, Blake was using Batman's gruff voice and nihilistic outlook to dispense parental advice on everything from nose-picking to homework in videos that attracted a massive following and global media attention. In BatDad, he'll offer that same style of advice through photos that capture the spirit and humor of the videos. Much like the bestselling Darth Vader and Son, BatDad's gifty package will be perfect for Father's Day and those everyday superheroes--aka parents--everywhere!"--

Author: Lisa Beth Johnson
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1645171884
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 196

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Book Description
The authors of Okay, Boomer deliver much-needed one-liners, puns, lists, and real-life tweets to lighten the load—and life—of moms everywhere. Moms need their laughs just as much as anyone, especially when they have to relieve the stress of cranky kids, oblivious spouses, and the challenges of balancing work and family while keeping it all together—at least on the surface! Mom Jokes is a collection of more than 300 snarky, sassy, and witty jokes for moms, such as . . . Every Mother’s Day my children make me breakfast in bed. Good thing I taught them how to make bottomless mimosas. What’s the difference between me when I’m nine months pregnant and a supermodel? Nothing, because my husband values his life. The good thing about going back to work after having kids is that you have your mom boss voice perfected. I thought my seven-year-old was mature enough to feed our goldfish—and he is—he just isn’t mature enough to know they don’t eat peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. From family life and the daily grind to food and entertainment, this collection of jokes nails the ups and downs of motherhood, giving moms light-hearted moments to get through the heavy lifting.

Author: Caroline Kusin Pritchard
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1534478272
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 48

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Book Description
In this hilariously sweet story about an opposites-attract friendship, chock-full of Yiddish humor, a girl and her best bird friend’s perfect day turns into a perfect opportunity to see things differently. Gitty and her feathered-friend Kvetch couldn’t be more different: Gitty always sees the bright side of life, while her curmudgeonly friend Kvetch is always complaining and, well, kvetching about the trouble they get into. One perfect day, Gitty ropes Kvetch into shlepping off on a new adventure to their perfect purple treehouse. Even when Kvetch sees signs of impending doom everywhere, Gitty finds silver linings and holds onto her super special surprise reason for completing their mission. But when her perfect plan goes awry, oy vey, suddenly it’s Gitty who’s down in the dumps. Can Kvetch come out of his funk to lift Gitty’s spirits back up?

Author: Forrest Carter
Publisher: UNM Press
ISBN: 0826316948
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 236

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Book Description
The Education of Little Tree has been embedded in controversy since the revelation that the autobiographical story told by Forrest Carter was a complete fabrication. The touching novel, which has entranced readers since it was first published in 1976, has since raised questions, many unanswered, about how this quaint and engaging tale of a young, orphaned boy could have been written by a man whose life was so overtly rooted in hatred. How can this story, now discovered to be fictitious, fill our hearts with so much emotion as we champion Little Tree’s childhood lessons and future successes? The Education of Little Tree tells with poignant grace the story of a boy who is adopted by his Cherokee grandmother and half-Cherokee grandfather in the Appalachian Mountains of Tennessee during the Great Depression. “Little Tree,” as his grandparents call him, is shown how to hunt and survive in the mountains and taught to respect nature in the Cherokee Way—taking only what is needed, leaving the rest for nature to run its course. Little Tree also learns the often callous ways of white businessmen, sharecroppers, Christians, and politicians. Each vignette, whether frightening, funny, heartwarming, or sad, teaches our protagonist about life, love, nature, work, friendship, and family. A classic of its era and an enduring book for all ages, The Education of Little Tree continues to share important lessons. Little Tree’s story allows us to reflect on the past and look toward the future. It offers us an opportunity to ask ourselves what we have learned and where it will take us.