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Author: Matthew Gasteier Publisher: Villard ISBN: 0345527658 Category : Humor Languages : en Pages : 242
Book Description
Perfect for the Scrooge in your life—a profane, hilarious takedown of all things cute and cuddly, by the author of the blog sensation of (almost) the same name Attention, all you clumsy pandas, lovable puffins, huggable bunnies, and penguins that elicit ooohs and aaahs: The jig is up! We have lived under your furry fists for too long. There is a cute and present danger lurking out there–in the wild, in the zoos, and sometimes even in our very own homes. Spurred on by the Cute Industrial Complex, these cuddly animals have taken over blockbuster films, inspirational posters, and computer desktops everywhere, further weakening the innocent civilians who are beguiled by these fuzzy frauds. But you are stronger than them, aren’t you? Those soft bellies and wet noses are no match for you–and their free ride has just come to an end. F U, Penguin is the rallying cry for those who choose to fight these power-hungry cute-mongers. Loaded with color photographs and hilarious commentary, this book will have you laughing out loud while it simultaneously saves you from the tragic fate of tossing yarn with big-eyed kittens and bottle-nursing baby pandas forever. ___________________________ "Finally, a book for the rest of us! Most animals go about our business without playing to the audience like the elitists exposed in these chapters.I wasn't sure how many more times I could hear about those great penguins and pandas and kittens before I started eating people... well, more people, anyway."—Jerry the Shark "Penguins killed my parents, and they would not hesitate to kill me. I thank the Crustacean God for Matthew Gasteier, a true saint and a decent human being in a world filled with heartless penguin accomplices."—Dennis the Krill "It's all true. We're the worst."—Anonymous Penguin "The average dolphin is far beyond this level of vulgarity, but I could see how this would be a very enjoyable book for humans. I should remember to hand these out to some of my slower relatives at the common ancestor reunion."—Edward the Dolphin "Thank you for your submission. Unfortunately, this style of book is not something we are currently looking for. However, we wish you the best of luck with your human publishers!"—Danielle the Bear, Editor-in-Chief, Random Cave Publishing
Author: Matthew Gasteier Publisher: Villard ISBN: 0345527658 Category : Humor Languages : en Pages : 242
Book Description
Perfect for the Scrooge in your life—a profane, hilarious takedown of all things cute and cuddly, by the author of the blog sensation of (almost) the same name Attention, all you clumsy pandas, lovable puffins, huggable bunnies, and penguins that elicit ooohs and aaahs: The jig is up! We have lived under your furry fists for too long. There is a cute and present danger lurking out there–in the wild, in the zoos, and sometimes even in our very own homes. Spurred on by the Cute Industrial Complex, these cuddly animals have taken over blockbuster films, inspirational posters, and computer desktops everywhere, further weakening the innocent civilians who are beguiled by these fuzzy frauds. But you are stronger than them, aren’t you? Those soft bellies and wet noses are no match for you–and their free ride has just come to an end. F U, Penguin is the rallying cry for those who choose to fight these power-hungry cute-mongers. Loaded with color photographs and hilarious commentary, this book will have you laughing out loud while it simultaneously saves you from the tragic fate of tossing yarn with big-eyed kittens and bottle-nursing baby pandas forever. ___________________________ "Finally, a book for the rest of us! Most animals go about our business without playing to the audience like the elitists exposed in these chapters.I wasn't sure how many more times I could hear about those great penguins and pandas and kittens before I started eating people... well, more people, anyway."—Jerry the Shark "Penguins killed my parents, and they would not hesitate to kill me. I thank the Crustacean God for Matthew Gasteier, a true saint and a decent human being in a world filled with heartless penguin accomplices."—Dennis the Krill "It's all true. We're the worst."—Anonymous Penguin "The average dolphin is far beyond this level of vulgarity, but I could see how this would be a very enjoyable book for humans. I should remember to hand these out to some of my slower relatives at the common ancestor reunion."—Edward the Dolphin "Thank you for your submission. Unfortunately, this style of book is not something we are currently looking for. However, we wish you the best of luck with your human publishers!"—Danielle the Bear, Editor-in-Chief, Random Cave Publishing
Author: Kari Schuetz Publisher: Bellwether Media ISBN: 1612117643 Category : Juvenile Nonfiction Languages : en Pages : 24
Book Description
Inside this book, a huddle of penguin chicks will warm your heart as they warm their bodies. The babies need mom, dad, and one another to survive the frigid temperatures of their Antarctic homes. Delight in reading as you watch baby penguins waddle across the pages.
Author: Florence Minor Publisher: Harper Collins ISBN: 0061130974 Category : Juvenile Fiction Languages : en Pages : 38
Book Description
If you were a penguin . . . You could swim really fast and toboggan on ice. Sing a happy duet, once or twice. You could live on land but dive under the sea. There's a lot penguins can do, just like you and me! Wendell and Florence Minor create a charming tribute to all the playful fun and activity that comes with being a penguin—which young readers can delight in too!
Author: Lynne Rickards Publisher: 'The Rosen Publishing Group, Inc' ISBN: 1499486545 Category : Juvenile Fiction Languages : en Pages : 34
Book Description
Pink! is a heartwarming story about learning to be different. Patrick wakes up one morning to find he’s turned pink overnight. But boys can’t be pink! Rejected by his friends, poor Patrick runs away in search of new pink playmates. He crosses oceans where he finds some pink flamingos, but will he ever fit in with them? Patrick soon learns that friendship is never black and white, but that real friends will accept you just as you are.
Author: Katie Kawa Publisher: Gareth Stevens Publishing LLLP ISBN: 1433955326 Category : Juvenile Nonfiction Languages : en Pages : 26
Book Description
How do baby penguins stay warm? What do they eat? Can baby penguins fly? The answers to these questions and many more are waiting for readers. Fun facts written in accessible language explain the exciting lives of baby penguins—from the egg to the ocean. Detailed photographs allow beginning readers to see these adorable baby birds up close.
Author: Sarah Aspinall Publisher: Scholastic Inc. ISBN: 1338095684 Category : Juvenile Fiction Languages : en Pages : 40
Book Description
Mama loves brightly colored flowers and her little penguins too! Tulip, Tiger Lily, Dandelion, Bluebell, Violet, and Broccoli use red, orange, yellow, blue, purple, and green to color in their snowy world and paint a colorful surprise for Mama. Will she know who painted what? Of course she will! But will YOU know? Simple language and arresting, graphic illustrations introduce readers to the six primary and secondary colors and the adorable antics of six creative little penguins. A lively text, asking children to participate by answering questions, makes this an engaging, heartwarming story that is perfect for bedtime, story time, or anytime.
Author: Rob Biddulph Publisher: HarperCollins Children's Books ISBN: 9780008419127 Category : Education Languages : en Pages : 0
Book Description
Merry Christmas! The internet phenomenon #DrawWithRob is now a fantastically festive art activity book for you to draw with Rob at home... The second book based on the viral videos seen everywhere on YouTube, Facebook, TikTok, TV, and more, from the creative genius and bestselling author Rob Biddulph! Christmas is different this year, with more families at home and wondering what to do! Pick up your pencils and join thousands of children around the world and #DrawWithRob - celebrating Christmas has never been so much fun! The first DRAW WITH ROB activity book went to Number One in the charts and was named 'Book of the Year' at the 2020 Sainsbury's Children's Book Awards! Now every family can share this fantastically festive new art activity book for Christmas. Join Rob and learn to draw your favourite Christmas characters - from Polar Bears to Elves and from Father Christmas to a Snowman, this perfect present is packed with arts, crafts and festive fun. The bestselling and award-winning author/illustrator Rob Biddulph is the genius behind the phenomenal, viral sensation that is DRAW WITH ROB and the accompanying activity book, and now the sensational DRAW WITH ROB AT CHRISTMAS - bringing joy to families everywhere with his easy to follow instructions and warm-hearted humour. So whether you're in home education, home-schooling, learning to draw or just having fun, let Rob show you that anyone can learn to #DrawWithRob! *WITH PERFORATED PAGES SO YOU CAN EASILY TEAR OUT AND DISPLAY YOUR ART!* Rob's original hit videos are also available at www.robbiddulph.com, and on Facebook, YouTube, TikTok, and Instagram, with Rob appearing on TV to talk about them too. Perfect stay-at-home fun for boys, girls, and everyone aged three to one hundred and three, and a wonderful introduction to Rob Biddulph's bestselling picture book range - including the Waterstones Children's Book Prize-winning Blown Away, Odd Dog Out, and many more! Available in all good bookstores and online retailers, and perfect for children who are learning to read - or just love to!
Author: Sarah Cullen (Author of children's books) Publisher: ISBN: 9780648849858 Category : Friendship Languages : en Pages :
Book Description
"He only wants to fit in. How far will this penguin go to try to fit in? Spike the Penguin wishes he wasn't different. Even though his parents tell him his bright red, orange, yellow, green, blue, and purple mohawk is beautiful, he still wants to hide his head under his flippers. Determined to find a way to be like everyone else, the sad little guy sets out on an Antarctic adventure! Diving deep into the ocean to seek a solution, Spike tries out seashell hats, squid-ink dye jobs, and a seal hair salon. But when no one can make him look just right, he fears he'll never be happy... until his friends share something unexpected. Can this penguin learn to appreciate his perfectly awesome plumage? Spike, The Penguin With Rainbow Hair is a heartwarming children's picture book written in playful rhyme. If you or your child like cute animals, silly scenarios, and stories about accepting everyone just the way they are, then you'll love Sarah Cullen and Carmen Ellis's fun-filled escapade."--Amazon.com.
Author: Epic Love Books Publisher: Independently Published ISBN: 9781090329912 Category : Nature Languages : en Pages : 102
Book Description
A beautiful emperor penguin notebook with a pretty animal activist quote in the center that reads Save the Penguins. A cute animal rights journal gift for someone who loves arctic birds. 100 page blank lined book.
Author: Matthew Gasteier
Author: Matthew Gasteier
Author: Kari Schuetz
Author: Crispin Boyer
Author: Florence Minor
Author: Lynne Rickards
Author: Katie Kawa
Author: Sarah Aspinall
Author: Rob Biddulph
Author: Sarah Cullen (Author of children's books)
Author: Epic Love Books